I have come up with a list of things to do, and not to do, if you ever decide to take your toddler and mother to the coast of northern California.DON'T get an outbound flight that leaves at 6am on an icy morning. Likewise, don't get a return flight that leaves from a major international airport at 5:45am on the one morning of the year when clocks are set forward by an hour. Your toddler will not thank you.
DO spend time exploring the beach and cliffs on the pacific - they're amazingly beautiful. Just remember to hold your child tightly if you hike down to wander on the beach. And don't let the warning sign making it sound like you will die if you hike scare you too much. Be careful, use your head, and you will be fine.
DON'T forget to bring an extra pair of pants, since children will sit in wet sand. And jeans and wet sand don't mix.DO have a snack sitting on a giant bench overlooking the cliffs and beach. When else will you get to sit on a giant bench?
Yes, he's roaring back at the ocean.
DON'T think you're too good for a rental minivan. You're not. 
And you will be glad for the extra space. Plus, you will look really cool riding in the passenger seat up the pacific coast highway with your middle-aged mom driving and your baby in the back. (Don't you love how parenthood redefines "cool?")
DO let your child explore in the redwoods around the home you're visiting. They're magical even for adults, but to hear an excited child say "big tree" over and over again will give you an even better appreciation. 
DON'T judge the Californians for their strange road signs. We don't need to know what they mean as long as they seem kind-hearted. This one does.
DO take a grandmother along. She's better than any toys on the plane, loves your baby even when he cries, isn't scared of diapers, rubs your back if you feel morning (or air-) sickness coming on, and seems genuinely happy to wake up at 4:30 in the morning when your son clearly missed the memo about California being on west-coast time.
DON'T take a walk on an unlit road in a redwood forest at 4:30 in the morning with an unleashed and unstrollered toddler. If you can't see your hand in front of your face, you can't see the baby. Only my mom would have to learn this from experience, I don't think many other people would even think to take a walk at 4:30 in the morning.
DO let your child play with the big stack of redwood boards left over from a deck-building project, though. He'll think they're special big blocks left there just for him.
DON'T talk on your cell phone in the stores. These small-town northern-california types don't appreciate it, and they're not afraid to let you know the guidelines before you enter. For some reason this reminds me of Luke from Gilmore Girls.
DO spend lots of time talking and visiting with rarely-seen relatives. They're fun, they're smart, they cook good food, and they have memories of family members passed on.
Nathan, Marmie, and Aunt Elaine
DON'T pretend to try to be a "good mommy" when your son throws a fit in the middle of the night and wants to play with a puzzle. Give him what he wants, you're a guest. And when he tires of the puzzle (haha yeah right) pull him into bed with you and don't think about how bad it is to sleep with your baby, just enjoy the rare cuddling and the sweet sounds and smells (again: haha yeah right) of having your child close. You can get back to a normal routine when you're home.
DO stop by Muir Woods, a national park just north of San Francisco, and enjoy the redwoods. They might not be as big (or drive-throughable) as some in the northern part of the state, but the park is gorgeous and accessible by stroller or even wheelchair. 
Plus, it will give you the chance to see how far your child can toddle before tuckering out. (For Nathan, it's close to a mile. Impressive, huh? He must get it from his grandmother, not me.) Bonus DO: if your mom has an internet friend who volunteers there, take her along! She might score you a good parking spot if you're paying attention (I wasn't). Another bonus DO: dress your kid in a witty t-shirt anytime you go to a national park, it makes him seem more precious and invites even more comments about the preciousness than normal. (And what blogging mommy doesn't love comments about how precious her child is?)
DO remember to have your camera accessible so you can take some pictures as your child takes his first ride across the Golden Gate Bridge. Maybe this should be a don't:
DON'T forget your camera, thus rendering yourself reliant on your mom's... wherever it might be packed.
DON'T let your son grab at your glasses on the plane. This should be a norm, but especially on a plane. He will break them, you will lose the tiny screw, and you will have to catch a shuttle to your car all but blind until you can locate the proper vehicle, get inside, and put your hands on your prescription sunglasses to drive back to the terminal where your mother is waiting with the luggage.
DON'T leave your mirror light on in the airport parking lot. Seriously, it will drain your car battery and you will have to ask a nice (but also tired, since he was returning to long-term parking as well) dad to help you push your car until it's accessible enough to give you a jump start. Maybe this should also be a do: DO pay for the nice man's parking.
DO come home and hug your husband, try to get your child back into a routine, snuggle with your puppies, and realize that even after a fun trip, it's nice to be home.
For more pictures of our trip, click here.
