Know what smells worse than poop? And worse than vomit?
Simon apparently ate some poop. And then threw it up.
Right next to my desk.
Not only does it smell gross, this stain will never come out. (That's despite Mark's quick sopping and spraying and steaming after my own cleanup attempt sent me straight to hover over the porcelain goddess myself.) And I will always remember what it is. Which means we might be closer to replacing the carpet in there than we originally thought. (Which we can't afford, since we're right in the middle of replacing our entire HVAC system (which ain't cheap), and it's supposed to be the year of suck anyway.
Oh well, this is why we were saving for a better emergency fund, right?