Friday the Thirteenth: Marker Edition

I've been waiting a few weeks to write this post, because it involves very naughty children who have been scheduled to visit grandparents, and I wanted said visits to still happen. But now that they are safely nestled in Huntersville (and Mark and I are safely out of town for a few days in Williamsburg - yay! and thank you!) I can safely let this go to post, without fear that they will be uninvited. Because... too late now!

HA HA SUCKAS. (Just kidding. Again, thank you.)

Um, but seriously. We had an Incident. With markers. It's exactly what you imagine it was.

One morning, Friday July 13th in case you're keeping track at home, after being upstairs in Charlotte's room, I came downstairs and found marker drawings everywhere. On the walls, on the window seat, on the window glass itself. And two very guilty-looking markered-up faces looking anywhere but at me.

I was furious. Hot angry tears, spinning in circles, almost without direction for my frustration.

First with Anneliese for coloring where she wasn't allowed (who does that? she knows better! Nathan would never do that! she's sooooo naughty!)...

Then with Nathan for giving her the markers (they both know she's not allowed to have them, and they had been put out of her reach, but apparently he can't say no when she asked for them anyway? and yes I recognize it's not fair for me to expect him to manage her rule-following BUT STILL)...

Then with Nathan again, because oh what's this? it's his preschool-scrawled name on the window. What the what! My compliant Rule Follower oldest child has this naughty streak too?

Later, after lots of deep breaths, a round of cell phone pictures (we are going to show daddy what you did!!! ugh words I never thought I'd utter) and a probably-over-their-heads lecture (daddy works hard to earn money to pay for this house and you would draw on it?? NO), I asked them why they broke the rules. Nathan bit his lip and nervously told me Anneliese did it, not him.

!!!!!!!

And then my heart shattered into a million pieces.

I know that this is something of a rite of passage -- kid steals markers, kid writes on walls, kid blames it on sibling. I know, I know, it's "normal" or whatever. I know it happens, all kids have lied to get out of trouble, and I'm not dumb enough to think this will be the last time. But to me, it's a Very Big Deal. All I could think was, MY BABY JUST LIED TO ME.

Am I raising a kid who's that scared of being punished? Am I that mean? Am I so angry that he's scared to tell me what happened?  And then, eventually, from the darker corners of my brain, what did I do to make him too scared to trust me with the truth?

(Ugh. We all have our emotional insecurities, and that's one of my worst.)

I felt blindsided and hurt and kind of... lost. He just would not admit it! Even when I told him I knew, and told him how terrible it is to lie, he stood his ground! What do you do with that? I can't make him tell me the truth!

(Come to think of it, this might be a parenting rite of passage too. I was lost, I tell you. LOST.)

In the absence of knowing what else to say or do, I got practical. Well, as practical as I ever am when I am emotional. I pulled out the magic eraser for Nathan, and some baby wipes for Anneliese, and I sat in the desk chair and cried and watched them scrub the walls. At first they complained that it wasn't coming off, and so I told them to scrub harder, and eventually they resigned themselves to it. My Miss Hannigan moment, except instead of being gleeful I was upset too.

It was a tensely quiet hour or so, just scrubbing and whimpering.

Marker babies are crying. And mean mommy is mean.

But eventually the drawings (mostly) came up, and while I was racking my brain about how to handle the lying, Nathan decided on his own to fess up, and apologize to boot. So, I guess that's a good thing? Because he admitted it on his own, and I didn't want that in itself to be met with a negative consequence, I just let the scrubbing be punishment enough. I didn't cancel his birthday party after all (yes, I was tempted, yes, I know it would've been too harsh, but I WAS LOST).

Anneliese is pretty much unfazed by most disciplinary consequences (time out? spanking? losing priveleges? eh), so I threw down the gauntlet and told her I'd take Hattie away (!) if she colored on the house again. It pained me, horribly. You don't take away a child's lovey! I know that, I do! But it's the only thing she's attached to, the only thing that matters, the only thing that would get her attention. It was my trump card and I played it. She panicked a little which told me she understood, though. I felt like a horrible mommy, but I was sending them to naptime with clean walls and a lie confession, so I thought I had handled it mostly okay?

But then the next day I found this:

and realized the horrible tearful angry scrubby whimpery morning before had been all for naught. AND I SOBBED AS IF I HAD NEVER SOBBED BEFORE.

(Know what is even more permanent than permanent marker? Pink highlighter. Which apparently I had missed in the previous day's Official Marker Roundup, oh my god fail so hard.)

The second-time offender was Anneliese (duh). And ugggggh I hated it but I had to follow through, so I made her bring me Hattie (and Jingle!) and they spent the day on the mantle in the living room. Where she could see them every time she walked through the room. Which caused lots of tears. Oh it was a terrible Hattie-free day. Lots of crying. I need something to hhhhhhug! Hattie is for to share!!

And hoo boy. I was mad at Anneliese for coloring on the couch, especially the second time, mad at her for punishing the rest of us by extending her misery at being punished, and mad at myself for being too mean, or mat at myself for feeling guilty about being too mean, or something.

Sad face. Times infinity.

But after that day, no more marker incidents. And as far as we know, no more lying. I don't really believe it's because I handled it well -- I mean, I know naughtiness will happen again, and I don't feel any better equipped with how to handle it. I still feel VERY VERY LOST.

These kids! And their dang free will!

In related, backdated news: hey mom and dad, remember that time I lost that ring under the new house and then lied about it? OH MY GOD I'M SO SORRY I PUT YOU THROUGH THAT.

Oh, and yeah Nathan and Anneliese probably won't color your houses this week. Um, good luck?

Splashy Fun with Nick and Barbara

A couple weeks ago, after Charlotte's first swim in our pool, but before Nick and Barbara moved into our guest house, we went to their neighborhood and swam in their pool. Which my kids love, for the giant shallow end and fun splashy fountains and such.

Charlotte took to the water much much better than she did the first time. We brought her in, she kicked and splashed, laughed, kicked and splashed some more, and then basically did that happily for two hours.

Finally we have a real pool lover on our hands!

Nathan and Anneliese had fun too. :)

And they all napped happily ever after.

Selfies With Kiddies

In case anyone is curious, I still can't quit the inward-facing camera on my new phone. The kids are fully on board too.

(I would be embarrassed for anyone to see exactly how much of this type of thing actually exists in my camera roll. Don't judge.)

Monster Towel

Less than a year ago, this towel pretty much swallowed her whole. Now, it barely reaches her bum.

your daily Charlotte

But even as they outgrow their stuff, they get even more beautiful. So I will take it.

Happy (Lego) Birthday, Nathan

Happy birthday, sweet Nathan!  FIVE YEARS OLD! 

(That deal we made about staying five forever? He's telling everyone about it. He's on board. So get used to us saying FIVE YEARS OLD! ok?)

We had a very sweet day with Nathan to celebrate. A coffee date, one-on-one reading time, a lunch outing, and a little lego party!

Yep, he has been counting down the days til he can play with the "big kid" legos (the ones that say 5+ on the box), which we have been resisting because of that one little baby we have around who puts everything in her mouth. But we held him off for long enough, and finally agreed to the "real" legos as long as they're put away in their own box which needs to stay in his room. (We'll see how that goes.)

So for his birthday he wanted to play legos and swim with his friends. Um, done. Hi there easy. We told him he could invite five friends over. And they were all actually available! Yay! So then I pinned All the Lego Things and we celebrated!

We made lego favor bags...

... and lego ice...

... and a lego cake...

... and then all the kiddies played with legos in hundred degree heat! Ahhh, july birthdays.

And ahhhh, swimming in the heat of July birthdays.

Related: five year olds in other families are brave! These kids were jumping in the deep end and swimming around like future olympians. Nathan and Anneliese mostly marked their territory over by the steps in the shallow end. (Just kidding, they didn't mark their territory. No peeing in the pool! I digress.)

And then there was also the part of the party where I was standing in the kitchen with melting colored lego ice dripping from my hands, pool water dripping on the floor, towel hanging half off me, when the governor** walked into my kitchen. So, yeah. That happened. Sometimes I wish I were classier. {{sigh}}

When the party aftermath had died down, Nathan finally got to do what he has been craving for months. Read instructions (this child is all! about! the instructions!) and build legos like it looks on the box mommy! He's basically living the dream here.

And then, with daddy on night shift, he got to sleep in mommy's bed (I was not complaining for extra birthday boy snuggles). He looks exactly like he did the day he was born. You know it's true.

Happy birthday, baby boy. FIVE YEARS OLD! We love you, Nathan booler.

*Truth: Another Nathan mostly did the bags. He's more... exacting than I am. (I mostly subscribe to the theology of good enough. It usually serves me well, but notsomuch in crafting.)

** Yes, we knew she was coming, to pick up her granddaughter who is one of Nathan's friends from school. Remember this?

Nathan's Fifth Year

Five years ago from right this minute, I wasn't even a mommy yet. (I was in too much pain to care. True story.) And then a few short hours later, I was. And it's been the hardest and best and most amazing five years of my life.

Thank you for making me a mommy, Nathan. Happy birthday, sweet boy, and a hundred more.

**********

Some of the very best bits of Nathan's past year:


(If you can't see the embedded video, click here to watch it on YouTube.)

(And if you're in the mood for a trip down memory lane, here are his first, second, third, and fourth year videos as well!)

Update in Quick Takes

Five quick take updates from 'round here:

1.) Nick and Barbara (Mark's brother and his wife) moved into the guest house last week. It's not as weird as it sounds. They have renters in their house in Cary, and haven't settled on a new house in Raleigh, so they're hanging out here for a while. Yes, we got the a/c fixed over there. Yes, we put a stove in for them. No, we couldn't find anything to do with the pool table so they're mostly just living around it. I guess. (I don't really know what they've done with the place since I haven't actually been in there since they moved in. Just, you know, giving them their space and such.)

2.) Charlotte is on all fours! (Well, if two of the four are elbows.) And rocking a bit. This whole crawling thing miiiiight happen by her birthday after all.

3.) On our summer bucket list was a round of swim lessons for Nathan, and he did it! I mean, he still can't swim, technically, but he got a lot braver and the peer pressure in a group setting was awesome. We'll do another session with him at some point, I'm sure.

4.) Remember that merger at Mark's company that we found out about the day we put the offer on this house? Well, it has finally happened, but not without kerfluffle, and the resulting aftershocks have left Mark feeling uncertain -- not about his job, which seems to be very secure for the indefinite future, but about his potential for career growth in a company everyone seems to increasingly mistrust. If you're the praying type, say a prayer for Marky in the next few days please? His job stuff feels very heavy this week, and he's hoping for some direction and some peace about it all.

5.) Anneliese is still naughty. Instead of boring you with the details, I will just leave it at that.

And there's the update from the land of Goettsch (now seven strong in this place)!

Tasty, Charlotte?

I don't think this is what they meant when they said keep her off baby food.

your daily Charlotte

(Somewhere off camera, Bowden is totally rolling her eyes.)

Almost Five

So I'm (almost) five years into this mommy gig now, and it turns out NOPE you never do forget those due dates! So, that answers that.

Another year, another July 22nd.

And this year, the days of the week have fallen exactly as they did in 2007 (well, since leap day) which means that each week as another Sunday rolls around (my weeks hit on Sundays), I remember exactly where I was in Nathan's pregnancy. Weird huh? How these Sundays have stuck with me? After five years! Especially over the last month.


July 1- finally it's here! I will have a baby this month! July 8 - recovering from Jenny's wedding. I didn't give birth in my bridesmaid dress! Win! July 15 - big event I'm in charge of at church tonight to welcome our new choir director. Don't have the baby yet, don't have the baby yet. July 22 - due date! Where is this baby? Seriously. I'm ready dude.

So while I was sitting around on that first July 22nd, wondering when Nathan would decide it was time to make me a mommy, I had no idea how fast the next five years would go. Like, stupid fast.

I'm sure someone told me then: don't feel too rushed about it, before you know it you'll turn around and he'll be ready for kindergarten and OH MAH LAWD IT'S TRUE. Because here I am now, with the baby who did finally appear, now... a beautiful bright little boy.

It stops me in my tracks sometimes. 

Nathan is a funny blend of silly and solemn. He is oh so smart (it might be tacky to say that, but it's true so I don't care) and learns so quickly and has a memory that continues to almost frighten us. Like, scary impressive.

He has a silly side that, when it comes out, is pretty contagious. He loves to dance (when he thinks no one is looking) and sing (when only parents and sisters can hear) and he's been known to squeal a nonsense word over and over and over again when the mood strikes (brrrrrreitsch! - with a rolled R and german accent, naturally). He shows affection to people by adding booler to the end of their names (hi pretty baby Charlotte booler!) and climbing all over them with hugs and giggles.

But he also takes himself very seriously. He wants things exactly how he wants them -- food, his clothes, his toys. Everything has a proper name, and no other name will do. (We don't call it The Cat in the Hat, we call it *Dr. Seuss* The Cat in the Hat. Yeah.) He wants to do things correctly, wants them to work, and is frustrated when it doesn't come to him easily. Fear of failure what.

In a crowd, he is the quiet one. Not one of the quiet ones, but the quiet one. The quietest one. He observes the people and activity around him, and later can recount what was going on, down to a scary level of detail, but he is hesitant to actually join in, in the moment. To the point where when strangers ask him questions, he mostly just freezes and stares, even when he perfectly well knows the answer. Which I guess is okay? So yeah, he's an introvert, through and through, which is surprising to us, considering how chatty and outgoing he was (within our family unit anyway) as a toddler. When it comes to social activity, he's just... cautious. 

He's actually kind of cautious in general. He doesn't love trying new things, but when he gets himself to do it, he's all grins and pride. Climbing to the high slide, doing tae kwon do, jumping in the pool. He tries only in his own time, and after much coaxing, but when he finally does, he's glad. (I'm trying to convince him the same is true for vegetables, which he continues to snub after the required few bites.)

His favorite things these days are dinosaurs, legos, books, trains, and he's still hanging onto the friend car love too. In the sweetness of his own room, he is also very attached to a handful of stuffed animals, mostly his tiger and giraffe, but he would never admit that to his friends. (Or that he still sucks his thumb to sleep or watch tv. (He doesn't do it in public, so no, it's not a battle we're choosing to fight at this point.)

He likes doing play-doh and drawing and writing. He's starting to learn to read, and I have to say that sounding out words with him, or letting him read the words he knows when we do bedtime books, is one of the most rewarding things I've ever done as a mommy (not on the list: potty training uggggggggggggh).

Nathan is super independent, not in a toddlerish I do it myself kind of way (see: Anneliese) but in that he's actually independent. I almost can't believe the day is here where he gets himself up in the morning, feeds himself (and sometimes his sister!) breakfast, dresses himself, plays DVDs by himself, (finally!) wipes his own bum, brushes his own teeth, bathes himself (we do his hair), and buckles his own seat belt. And since he can clearly handle the responsibility, we also have him unload the silverware from the dishwasher, feed Bowden and let her out, clean his own room, clean out his part in the back of the van, etc. (Oh what's that sweetie? You want independence? I'm hearing... chores.) I guess it's all very normal for a kindergartner, but it still startles me sometimes that he's such a big kid already.

The very best thing in Nathan's world is probably (you guessed it) Anneliese. His partner in joy and in crime. I have always believed that a sibling is a gift, but even with my own rockin awesome brother/sister experience, the connection between these two is more than I could have dreamed. If there's one mommy prayer I pray consistently from day to day, it's that this relationship will stay so beautiful and supportive and honest and real, for many many more years to come. If the 2yo/4yo manifestation is this wonderful, imagine how it will look when they're teenagers! Young adults! Grandparents! Of course I also hope someday for Charlotte to feel close to both of them as well, but right now I am so enjoying the way these two enjoy each other. No one brings bigger smiles or better laughs from Nathan and Anneliese than they do from each other.

I shed a happy tear over this whole thing at least several times a week. It's maybe the most lovely thing in my world, watching my children love each other.

And I know I have been saying this for years, but my favorite thing about Nathan continues to be his kindness. Although this year saw some firsts in terms of the naughties (including lying to mommy *gasp* yes I am still aching over that one), he mostly continues to impress us with his keen sense of empathy. I guess that's the whole observational thing he's got going on. He knows and notices what people like and don't like, hates when others are hurting, and is seriously joyful with them when they're happy. He's sensitive and sweet with his smiles and hugs and a genuine desire to understand why people feel the way they do.

He offers earnest compliments even in odd circumstances (after the gym: you don't need to change, those pants look so cute on you), is quick to notice when someone does something well (good job buckling your seat belt mommy!) and says excuse me and thank you even to creatures who don't really understand (like Charlotte and Bowden). Nice kid win.

So basically he's (mostly) a dream of a five-year-old. But the important thing is that we love him to bits, always more and more through the mind-boggling changes since five years ago, and we were already in love then. It's a bizzarre thing isn't it? Every child does it, and every parent must feel the profound sense of simultaneous loss and growth and adoration. All across the globe, for thousands of generations, people have known this love. It's far from unique, but really and truly: it's nothing short of a miracle.

We love you, Nathan. Our almost-five-year-old.

Away

I am about to say something shocking.

(Well, shocking to those of you who knew me in college, anyway. And maybe a few more. I hope.)

Until this weekend, I hadn't been away from my children and husband in... wait for it... five years.

!!!

Since becoming a mommy, I have had time away with Mark, and time away with the kids, and time away with each kid, but no time away from all of them. I have been racking my brain (racking!) and I can't think of a single time. Not one night. In five years.

I KNOW.

Who am I?? Believe me, I didn't wait this long on purpose. It would have happened sooner if I had realized the enormity of the thing. But actually I didn't even realize it was happening when it was, until I was already flopped on the guest bed of some people I had met only moments before, my dear husband and children left behind on the other side of North Carolina. 

The whole away thing was a bit unintentional actually. Another Nathan has been asked to lead music for youth conferences at Montreat next summer (you have no idea how proud we are of him, or how richly blessed those kids will be to have him there. Seriously with the talent, that one) and in preparation, he wanted to get up there for a few worship services and talks this summer and refresh his memory on the lay of the (youth conference) land. And because I hear about this place all the time but had never been, and have been dying to meet his Asheville people and see where he used to live and work before he came our way, he was sweet enough to do his reconnaissance mission on a weekend when I could go too.

Which is I how I ended up as a stranger in that guest room across the state.

yay Montreat

So anyway, his Asheville people are wonderful people, his original North Carolina family (before there was a mess of Goettsch in his life). And Montreat is truly beautiful. I can see why so many people hold it so dear. The worship services were engaging and energetic, and the keynote talk we heard was pretty much stunning. I almost cried like four times. (You know almost means did right?) We got to indulge in Asheville's foodie culture -- I probably didn't eat some kind of pimento cheese every day, and definitely not at every meal. *ahem* And we also saw my college roomie Emily!

An easy weekend away, close enough yet far enough, alone enough without being lonely. Basically it was the perfect way to mark a milestone I didn't even know I was waiting on.

yay friends

Oh and here's a milestone I was anticipating: it was also the first time I left Charlotte overnight. They say this gets easier with each child, but for me it's gotten harder. With Nathan I did it at about seven months (when Daddy stayed in the hospital with him one night), with Anneliese I did it at about nine months (for Sarah's wedding), and now with Charlotte she's almost one. Weird? Anyway.

The long and the short of it is we all did just fine, and it was a lovely weekend. So, yeah. That's that.

A Thousand Posts

If a picture says a thousand words, then what does it mean that it has taken me a thousand posts, several thousand pictures, and hundreds of thousands of words, to share my family with this little corner of the internet?

Five years ago it started as a kind of internet birth announcement, a simple way to show pictures of brand new tiny Nathan to our family and friends without bombarding everyone with emails (we weren't on facebook then... remember when babies came into the world and it wasn't a Facebook Thing? HA HA WEIRD). So this little blog was born.

And over the last five years I have sat down one thousand times and written something down about us or our lives -- fun or dumb, important or nonsense, lamenting or celebratory. A thousand times I have done this! (I almost can't wrap my brain around it.)

We started it mostly to share with other people, but now it's also totally for me. Oh, the things I would worry about if I didn't have bright encouraging people reading and sending their smarts my way. The friendships I wouldn't have kindled (or rekindled!) because of this curious thing about putting our lives on the internet. But mostly, whoa dang, the little moments that would be totally forgotten if I didn't write them down and share them.

five years and a thousand posts later:
our fun/awkward/grumpy/smiley family

These thousand posts have become an odd sort of record, or something, of what this season has been like for us. A trail of memories all jumbled up together in my beautiful mess of a family.


Here's to a thousand more.

Middle Children, Oldest Children

So I have barely posted in the last week. Let's pretend it's not about the rash of naughtiness that's left me feeling angry and overwhelmed and raw. Let's say instead that it's about... oh I don't know... just off the top of my head... Ashley and Liam have been visiting! (A way better excuse to be away from the computer.) 


So in lieu of a cranky post about my parenting woes, instead look at this beautiful picture of the two best middle children I know. (And I know a lot of middle children. Seriously I'm a magnet for them.)

Middle child syndrome?
I get that from my aunt.

Liam and I are going to stick together as "oldest kids" and be uptight and Type A and rule the world, decently and in order. With labels. And files. And charts and graphs. And confidence that we know best. Right buddy? 

More oldest children, unite! 

When we took these pictures, Charlotte was... um... somewhere? Maybe I've been seeing too much red recently to hunt the pics down? Or maybe they're still just hanging out in Ashley's camera. 


Yeah let's go with that. 


Poor forgotten youngest child.

Update on the Antics

So after a month or more of naughty nonsense, I am happy to say that things are going a tiny bit better in the world of should-be-sleeping.

Let me start by saying that we figured out it is indeed Anneliese causing most of the chaos.  Sure, Nathan partakes, and gladly so. But when we remove him from the equation (like when he sleeps in our room), she still wakes up at oh dark thirty; it's not him waking her. Even though he starts off in our bed to read every evening, she still disassembles the doorknob safety and creeps out into the hallway; it's not him tempting her out.

In short, she's the problem. (Well, Nathan isn't exactly part of the solution, so...)

The most important thing we did is buy this:

Yes, that is an alarm clock for a toddler. A thirty dollar alarm clock for a toddler. (I KNOW. But we were that desperate, and the twitterverse said it would work, so I dropped the moolah. I don't even know who I am anymore.)

It's kind of genius, actually. It's an alarm clock that instead of buzzing, turns green when it's time to get up. (Well, technically it does buzz if you want it to. And of course Anneliese has figured out how to set it to buzz at random times. Of course she has.) It's perfect for kids who are old enough to understand there are times when they need to stay in their rooms, but not old enough to understand the time itself. So basically we put thirty dollars (and all our hopes and dreams) into this thing.

And it mostly works. Sometimes she comes out when it's still white and I have to gently bring her back into her room and remind her to wait. She doesn't love it, but she does it. When she does finally get to come out of her room, she feels like it's on her own terms and she's happy to be a big girl about it.

(Step two would be finding better fancier doorknob safeties that she can't disable. They have been ordered. But it hasn't come to that yet.)

By the time she comes downstairs, Charlotte and I have had an extra hour of sleep, which sets the day off way better, obviously. And Nathan has had his own quiet time and is sufficiently awake enough himself for human interaction.

While Charlotte and I nurse and snuggle and wake up slowly, the big kids play a little together. Sometimes it's not awesome (like when they color on each other with markers or soak each other with the hose -- activities that are mostly harmless until they're not) but mostly it's completely adorable, like Nathan helping Anneliese open her yogurt or put her shirt on.

Oh those two. Cue heart melting.

sweet pic by emu

So, yeah. The moral of the story is everyone is less cranky when Anneliese falls asleep without distraction, then stays in her room a bit longer in the mornings.

And that's the update on the antics.

{Disclaimer 7/16: I wrote this last week so it's been sitting (waiting for pics) since *before* we had a terrible horrible no-good very bad morning involving more naughtiness than I can even put into a blog right now. Post for another day. Suffice it to say, it got worse before it got better, and I'm still just clinging to a thread of hope about that better part. There was marker. And there was magic eraser. And oh there were tears. Uggggggggh.}

A Sibling (Lego) Love Moment

Sometimes, in the midst of the chaos and the whining and the feeding and the juggling of three tiny growing creatures with their own individual and varying needs, in the midst of feeling guilty about time and attention for all of them, while simultaneously arguing with myself that my time and attention isn't the be-all-end-all, and that siblings, while attention-stealing, truly are a gift, sometimes in the midst of that, I have a moment of clarity about how wonderful it all really is.

And then things feel happy and uncomplicated. I like those moments.

Charlotte at Eleven Months

Listen, this is weird: this is my last baby-month blog update. Probably ever. Charlotte is eleven months old, which means in a few short weeks she will be one and then she'll soon be a toddler not a baby and she's my last one and this is all going too fast and nooooooooooooo.

Deep breaths.

So like I was saying (in the most logical, least emotional way possible), Charlotte is eleven months old. And doing so great.

shiny eyes and crazy hair and gappy grin = love

Since the hospital, she has stayed with her all-milk diet and we haven't re-introduced solid food yet. She's doing well on milk, and gaining weight, so why run the risk of fussing with her tummy again until she's completely caught up? (Also you don't hear me complaining. In case I haven't mentioned it once or a hundred times, baby food sucks.) She's sucking down about six bottles a day, plus nursing once or twice, and seems perfectly content with that.

She's also become (dare I say it?) kind of... mobile. I mean, she can't really crawl, but she can definitely drag herself and roll herself to where she wants to go. Yesterday that meant right out the back door and down the stoop in an attempt to go play with Nathan and Anneliese who were squirting each other with the hose. (I intervened too late. They got Charlotte too.) She's also sitting well, very consistently, and will gladly bear weight on her legs which continues to be the most shocking thing a Goettsch child can do.

We're also seeing a sensitive side of Charlotte come out now that she's moving around a little.  For months, firm words, while she certainly heard them, were really only directed at other people. But now that she's kind of into everything, we've had to do some quick yelps and grabs to save her from things like, say, power cords and electrical sockets.  And it just breaks her heart every time. The lip trembles and she cries a sad sad cry. We're trying to be as gentle as we can in our reprimands so we don't make her panic, while still also teaching her that some things really are scary. That chair! It will tip over! Really!

She's increasingly dependent on other people to entertain her. She has a high tolerance for stimulation, and a low tolerance for boredom. She doesn't ever seem exhausted of Nathan and Anneliese all up in her face with noisy toys and voices and silliness, but when they're ready for a break she's pissed. Never too much attention for this one! Did you know there's nothing more hilarious than a big brother showing how high he can jump, or a big sister blowing on your face over and over again?  True story.

I'm trying not to panic that before the next month passes, my last baby will be past her official babyhood (*sobs*) and suddenly I won't be a mom of little babies anymore. For the first time in five years. (Oh heavens. Five years. Also before the month is out, Nathan will be five. Speaking of panic. Post for another day.) For now I am going to make the most of another few weeks of her first year.

Happy eleven months, sweet growing girl.

Wrightsville Beach Day

Mark's rotating schedule means that he has every fifth week completely off of work (yes you may be jealous now), and when we're smart, we remember to fill those weeks up with fun family things.

Like the beach.

We loaded up the kids and a whole day's worth of beach stuff (in case you were curious, it's a lot) and drove a few hours to Wrightsville Beach. It has been a really hot week here, but it was about twenty degrees cooler (still upper eighties woooo hoooo!) than it had been, so it was the perfect day for the beach. (Let the record show we were still super hot.)

Nathan and Anneliese raced their dump trucks around predictably, Mark helped everybody splash in the waves, we ate a sandy lunch from the cooler.

I tried to get Charlotte to lie around with me on the towels, but she wasn't having any of it.  Now that she can kind of drag herself around on her belly, she wanted to explore. 

Cut to her an hour later with a torso rubbed raw, and sand covering her whole body. 

Oh and furious about it.

This picture pretty well sums up her day: desperately trying to keep up with big brother and big sister, and just not being quite as quick.

Aw. Little baby Charlotte. You don't know it yet, but you're in for a lifetime of this. It will get easier, sweetie.

Oh and no matter what Anneliese tells you about our beach day, she did not pee in the ocean.

Asleep in the Carseat, Three Babies of Mine

If I would have known how many hundreds of pictures I would take of my children asleep in this car seat, I might have bought one with more beautiful fabric.

It's okay. The babies make it beautiful enough.

Nathan, 9 months

Anneliese, 6 months

Charlotte, 10 months

Curly Thumby Tuckered Middle Child

When she gets all sweet like this, I almost forget that she's in an ugly habit of fit-pitching these days. Almost.

The thing is, Anneliese is driving me nuts. Yes I just said that out loud to the internet.

When she is happy, she's a bundle of rainbows and jellybeans. When she's not, she's... not.

I think the bedtime/wakeup antics are taking a toll on her, because she seems exhausted and whiny so often, and her fuse is so much shorter than normal. One little thing to set her off, then she's in tears.

Like, for an entire morning.

Several days a week.

Cut to me hiding in the bathroom in the fetal position yanking my hair out and trying not to hear it.

By the end of the afternoon on these capital-h Hard Days, she is usually reduced to a whimpering mess. Still whiny, but without the fight.

See? She's tired.

So on the days when this is the best I can get from her, I'm very into tuckered-out snuggly Anneliese.

(Someone please help us regain our sleep control. Please. This is an SOS.)

Baby's First Fourth

Look who's been doing a bangup job of sitting by herself! All day! No tipsies!

your daily Charlotte: American girl. Excellent sitter.

What, you have a better way to celebrate our nation's independence than being cute and perfecting your gross motor skillz? Didn't think so. 


Baby, you're a firework.

Hot Summer Days in the Pool

I don't know if y'all have noticed, but it's hot as the blazes out there. After a really cool spring and summer so far, it's been well over a hundred here for several days now. It's almost too hot to be outside, but the pool is just so excellent for cooling off that we can't resist a few minutes most mornings.

Nathan is getting so brave and swimmy! Floating around without clinging too hard to us!

He's tall enough to walk around a bit in the shallow end (our shallow end really isn't that shallow, sadly for toddlers) and he's gradually getting braver about standing and playing. He's a bit afraid, a bit excited, a bit proud. Can you tell?

Anneliese mostly sticks near the steps. She talks the big talk -- I can swim by myself! I go under the water! There's no water in my eyes because I have my gabbles on! -- but yeah... no. She's a big chicken. 

(And there's no convincing her that her gabbles are actually on her forehead, not her eyes.) 


Charlotte and Bowden mostly watch from the sidelines. They both go between the sun where they can be close to the action, and the shade where it's more comfortable (and where mommy worries about them less.)

Anyway the pool has been our main respite in this heat. Easy playtime that always thoroughly exhausts the kids. Win.

And when the babies are finally napping? This is my view. 

Not complaining.


Stay cool, kids. It's getting ridiculous out there.