Happy 12th Birthday, Nathan!

Well it's the end of July again, which means it's time to dust off Ye Olde Blogge because birthday season is upon us, and here remains my best option for capturing something of my babies' baby-selves (yes they're still babies), besides what's happening on insta and whatever.

(Has the social corner of the internet grown into an almost-teen right alongside Nathan? Yes? Yes, it has. The first iPhone was born the same month he was, and well, here we are living in this whole new internet future.)

He's TWELVE today. (!!)

Happy birthday, baby Nathan!!

I wish I had a lovely real professional picture of him but alas, I don't yet, that won't happen for a few more weeks (I'm getting less rigid in my old age) (haaaaa HA you know that's a lie, obviously) (it's just been a busy few weeks and I decided it could wait) (hmmm actually that does sound legitimately like less rigid; I'll take it) and ANYWAY here, enjoy this pic of him from his first day of school yesterday, instead:

He started 7th grade yesterday (still on a modified schedule) and doesn't it sound so old? Seventh grade? He had a good school year last year, which we were surprised and grateful for (surprised because transitioning to middle school sort of sucks amirite? and grateful because we ain't no fools). He loved Chinese best, and took a new interest in history/ social studies. He still likes math and science too, but seems less attached to them over other subjects than he used to be. He does that thing where he's so balanced/fair/noncommittal (Hufflepuff!) that it's hard to tell sometimes what he really likes best, because he seems to moderately enjoy almost all of it. But his affinity for Chinese is clear.

He is still playing his cello and had a great year in orchestra, much better than we knew to expect at his new school. He gets to combine with the band kids and play in a symphony group with brass and winds and percussion which is new to him and has been a really rewarding musical experience.

He has also leaned all in at church this year. He adores youth choir, has turned into a decent little tenor, and seems to have a renewed interest in worship and youth group and faith formation. We did a new (to us) conference at Montreat this year, and he got to be a Music and Worship conferee (Anneliese too!) which they both really liked.

He continues to be obsessed with sports, more obsession in my book than is really warranted considering we have very much screeched the breaks on anything beyond Y teams or city rec league. He watches soccer and football and baseball and fancies himself a future professional, which... mmmkay. (I know, I know, this is normal 12yo kid things, I just need to roll my eyes a little.)

He is still eating everything in sight, says his favorite is steak and also Asian food. He loves Master Chef Jr and still likes to try "helping" in the kitchen and at the grill. He started reading the Lord of the Rings books, but secretly when he doesn't think we are paying attention, he still can't quit the Who Was biographies and takes them to bed on the reg, to read under the covers. He is more and more outgoing and might even be turning into the most extroverted person in this house? (I don't even know what's happening, y'all.)

He loves playing soccer with Charlotte, making videos with Anneliese, trampolining and minecrafting and outside pretending with both of them, building legos in solitude, and he has more patience for little-sister Beanie Boos than I'd ever expect of a kid his age, and yet I'm also not super surprised.

He is kind and confident. He is very anxious and stressed when things don't go how they are "supposed" to go, and we like to joke that his life MO might be "the rules are in place so everyone can JUST HAVE FUN." (Rules: he likes 'em.) He is also bossy and helpful and shows excellent judgement. He's responsible and independent in the best kinds of ways -- managing his own school stuff with very little input needed, riding the city bus home from school on his own every day, getting himself up and going every morning, remembering his schedule and his calendar things. He is curious and snuggly and is in motion 80% of the time. (Growing bodies, man.) He is a really wonderful human, and we love him.

Some of our favorite moments this year are in the video below, including grandparent visits, flights to Minnesota (including a Vikings stadium tour) and to California (!!!) to see Clemson play in the national championship bowl game (I know that's not technically what it's called, don't @ me). Plus Montreat and a road trip and general fun at home:



(If you can't see the video embedded above, click here to watch it on YouTube.)

We love you so much, buddy. And yes, you're twelve and still a baby, thank you for agreeing to this arrangement. Happy birthday, dear Nathan.

Past videos and memories:

Nathan's 10th year
9th year
8th year
7th year
6th year
5th year
4th year
3rd year
2nd year
1st year 

Nathan at Almost 10

Well I never thought I would see the day, but this year -- ten years in -- is the year I finally had to ask myself a few times, trying to remember which was Nathan's due date. (The 22nd. It was the 22nd!)

It's also the year everything went completely bananas and I stopped even pretending to blog, but I have to leave this space here anyway, my own little corner of the internet, because I need a home for memories and milestones and that kind of thing, even if the day-to-day captures have moved to other online homes.

As this is posting, our family is floating northward on America's highways, en route to Wisconsin Dells, because a day of giant waterparks is what Nathan requested for his 10th birthday, and we do love a reason for a road trip. (And a waterpark.) (And a celebration.) It's funny how tween and preteen birthday requests have moved away from toys and Thomas and Friend Cars, and are now all about devices and bikes and projects and trips. COME BACK TO ME, FRIEND CARS. (Cars 3 is out this summer and I won't lie, I'm dying to see it just so I can cry some nostalgia tears remembering the baby and toddler years.)

So yeah, Nathan is about to turn ten. We've known him for a decade. We've been parents for a decade. I am so freaking full of Feelings my head has been spinning for weeks.

Nathan has had a really good year -- dare I say it was even better than when he was five? (#fiveforever!) He is kind and responsible and funny, and while he remains a true introvert, he is ever more out of his shell. He likes public speaking, and he is proud anytime he can be in a leader role.

He is doing pretty well in school, working hard enough to make decent grades, but not so hard he sacrifices precious Pokemon chatter time. He loves science and math, and loves reading history and biography books. It's taken me years to convince him that novels (or any fiction) are also a delight, but finally FINALLY he is very super crazy into Harry Potter, is partway through the 7th book, and talks about almost nothing else these days. In classic Nathan fashion, he spends hours in internet rabbit holes about fan theories and movie castings and behind the scenes info, and lost in Pottermore fandom, and he thinks it's very important that I tell you here that he's a proud Hufflepuff who thinks fairness, justice, loyalty, and inclusion are the most important things (this is actually delightfully accurate about him).

These days he says he'd like to be an architect when he grows up; he spends lots of his time building and designing all manner of things with his legos and sketching and any boxes or tubes or bottles or other crap he pulls from the recycling bin. (He might or might not have a tiny hoarding problem in his room.)

He also loves watching Master Chef, Jr, and has been harboring some serious cooking desires recently. He wants to try new foods and learn to make them, and we don't even know what happened to our little baby who only ever wanted to eat bagels, and now requests lunch dates so he can have some grilled salmon which we never really fix at home. He delights me in surprising quirky ways, and I love seeing him become more and more himself.

He has become surprisingly (to us! we didn't see it coming!) athletic in the last year, thriving at soccer, making a good effort at basketball, and swimming and running faster than many kids his age, despite his small size (he's still the tiniest kid in his grade). He had two bad scooter spills this year resulting in a few (minor) fractures and injuries in his wrist, elbow, knee and hip -- and spent most of his spring in a leg cast, wrist brace and sling. He was discouraged at the time, but has recovered with no problems and is back to normal now.

He's still playing his cello, and has buckled down and really worked hard at this year; we are officially impressed by what he can do. And! He can now match a pitch, singing! We also never thought we'd see that day. :) He loves choir at church, partly because he's suddenly a great singing leader, and partly because as one of the older kids, he has lots of chances for speaking parts and reading at the front of the church, which he loves.

He and Anneliese are still chummy with each other above all others, but are learning to branch out and be social with their own peer groups and also with Charlotte. They've had a few moments of pain together this year that were hard to watch, but also good to see them grow and learn.

Nathan is still the tiny adult in our family, classic oldest child: doing a funny dance between needing to be a baby with snuggles and back scratching and coddling -- and acting as grown up as possible, bossing his sisters and generally trying to manage everyone and everything around him (I seriously have NO IDEA WHERE HE GETS THIS *ahem*). He's helpful, sometimes to a fault, but we love about him that  he always takes initiative and looks to see what others might need or want. His toddlerhood excellence at empathy is manifesting in new and caring ways, and we are so proud.

Happy almost-ten to our wonderful, serious, funny, loving, bright baby boy. Watching you grow for a decade has been the greatest joy of our lives.

Great Wolf Birthday

Nathan opted out of a typical birthday party this year in favor of an overnight trip to the Great Wolf Lodge, which he has been asking to do for years, and daaaaang can I just say this is a great idea? Family time? Fun. Water slides? Fun. Great room with built in cabin? FUN. And no managing rsvp's and filling favor bags and planning party games and worrying your child's friends have summer plans and are hard to catch up with and then cleaning up after them? RECOMMEND.

We woke up early to hit the road, so we had Nathan's birthday cake first thing. For breakfast dessert! (Oh, the small things that delight children.)

(I made Smitten Kitchen's Pink Lady Cake but with raspberries instead of strawberries, and you should definitely do that if you like fruity cake. I only made a third of the recipe since hers is hyuuuge.)

We went to the Great Wolf Lodge in Williamsburg (there are two about the same distance from us, and that one had better ratings), and we only went for one night. We weren't sure of the timing but it turns out that was a great length for us. We got there at 1, which is the earliest you can get a water park bracelet on your check-in day. Our room wasn't ready til 4, but we knew that going in, and we (I) had packed our swimsuits and stuff smartly, so we had "day at the pool" bags separate from our suitcase.

So we had several hours at the waterpark, and this was peak crowds, it turns out (which makes sense, since that day's checkout people can stay til close and people like us were there ready to play before our own checkins), but even at peak crowds it was still fine. Only the biggest baddest slide had a long line, and that was.... fifteen minutes? So, fiiiiine.

And y'all, the slides are GOOD! They say "waterpark" indoors, but people throw that term around loosely, and sometimes a "waterpark" at a hotel is like, a cool pool with several slides. So, you never know. But this was legit! They were big and fast and really fun, even for adults.

You have to be 48 inches to do most of the big ones, so Nathan and Anneliese could go on whatever they wanted. There were a handful of slides for smaller kids too, but Charlotte had zero interest. She mostly just wanted to skip through the splash pools, chicken out at the tops of even the baby splash slides, and find her zen in the wave pool.

Anneliese, meanwhile, is our adventure-seeker and waited in  line for the biggest coolest (scariest) slide a gazillion times.

We went out for a family birthday dinner, and they had a steak on the kids menu, and Nathan desperately wanted it, which is of course fine. Steak dinner!

(He needed help learning to cut it. It was adorable.)

We opened presents in our room, which was sweet.

Our room was great! It had a fireplace and a fridge and a table and couch and sitting area. Plus a balcony. And a cabin! With bunk beds!

They have several kinds of suites (tents, caves, cabins) but Nathan liked this one because it had room for a third kid in the fun part, instead of just getting stuck on a sleeper sofa. So if you have three kids, get the cabin. When you're a child (or a grownup, ha), there's nothing much cooler than a novel place to sleep in a hotel room.

The hotel has all manner of things for kids to do if you get tired of the waterpark (we didn't, really, but some people might). Like a round-the-clock schedule of included activities in the lobby, like kiddie yoga, and crafts, and button making, and character appearances, and milk/cookies at bedtime, and a PJ bubble party. (We did stop by that.) (Mark taught Charlotte the electric slide. Haaaaaaa.)

I had heard that lots of stuff at GWL would cost extra, and we would rack up room charges on all manner of things (everything goes through your room key, which is also your waterpark wristband, which is very easy and also therefore potentially dangerous), but we didn't find that to be the case at all. Everything we wanted to do was included, we went out for one dinner, we brought our own yogurt and cereal and pop tarts for breakfast (there's a fridge in every room, we'd have been dumb not to), and we used a resort credit booking promo to buy lunch and snacks and frozen drinks at the pool.

Apparently there is a magic game involving wands and extra charges that lots of kids love, but our kids were happy to chase Pokemon and no one tried to push any of those extras on us or anything. I don't think our kids even noticed they existed, which is nice. Some places market that stuff directly to kids which is so maddening, but GWL didn't, so A+ to them.

Anyway it was totally a good experience, especially for a birthday (every kid gets wolf ears at check-in, but Nathan's had a special hat on them so all the staff could see he was a special occasion kid, and treated him as such, which was very sweet -- and he also got a token for a free treat at the ice cream parlor, which is a nice touch). It felt special enough and out of the ordinary that for the kids it was a Very Big Deal, and for us it was really easy to have a night in a place that clearly knows how to cater to families.

(Well, I say easy except my broke-ass foot was really tired from walking barefoot all around the waterpark. I have been weaning off my boot cast and into sturdy hiking shoes, but all those barefoot hours were a more strenuous wean than I should have done. I'm still hoping it doesn't come back to bite me later. I feel dumb, yo.)

Nathan is Nine! Happy Birthday!!

Nathan is officially nine! Happy birthday!

As always, some of our favorite memories from the last year:


(If you can't see the embedded video, click here to watch it on YouTube.)

And, for those who are so inclined (as we always are!) - allllll his other birthday videos, too: his first year, second year, third year, fourth year, fifth year, sixth year, seventh year, and eighth year.

Happy birthday, dear Nathan. We love you so much.

Nathan at Almost Nine

Nine years ago today, I woke up eager to read the new last final Harry Potter book, and eager to meet my unborn baby, but hopefully not at the same time. (Was secretly worried my  labor would interrupt my Series Ending Feelings before I could finish.) (It didn't.) (Was also not-so-secretly worried that I wouldn't even know I was in labor, doing that awkward 40-weeks mental dance of "pee or broken water?" because the end of pregnancy is so glamorous.)

I can't believe that was nine years ago.

It no longer feels like yesterday, exactly, but it also feels like... well, not like nine years. And if this is what nine years feels like, then I can't believe I only have nine left. He's halfway out of the house! Which is not a ridiculous mental milestone at all so bite your tongue.

Today* he's a full-on big kid, doing big kid things, like reading Harry Potter himself. (Yes! Novels! He reads them now!) (Sometimes!) (He still would choose a biography or fact book nineteen times out of twenty.)

*Well, today today he is not doing any big kid thing or reading any books, because he's battling down a barf bug as I type this. Having a big kid means that when they're sick, you sit ten feet away at the computer and listen to them dry heave while you write a blog post about them. It's both easier and harder than having a sick baby.

(Oh who am I kidding. It's totally easier.)

He's a good sick kid though. He's rull pukey in general when he's sick, so he's kind of a champ at it by now. If one of the kids has to be barfy, I'm glad it's him. Which is a weird thing to say about him at this milestone juncture, but it's organic to our day, so, there you go.

Besides A+ barfing, which I feel like I should stop talking about now, Nathan is doing really well these days. I was told that eight would be as good as five, and I think maybe it has been. Eight is much less moody than seven, and much more helpful, and much more worldly.

He needs me less than ever, but when he does need me, he needs me bigger. If that makes sense. When we do encounter rough patches, it's not about whining or potty training or grabbing anymore, it's about honesty and sneakiness and work ethic and bullies and the balance between fitting in and being doggedly confident in who you are. Raising tiny humans is no joke, and we are constantly flying by the seat of our pants, especially with Nathan, because the oldest kid is always throwing stuff at you you didn't even know you didn't know, didn't think of to think about. Parenting: not for the faint of heart.

He is still doing great in school, although he's right in that space where from a teacher's perspective he is fiiiiiiine and doing his work well enough, and not causing trouble, that he flies under the radar a bit when he's not doing his best, because it's still good enough. So we have had a lot of conversations about not half-assing his schoolwork, and not rushing to be done, and not practicing only the parts he already knows just because they're more fun to play, etc etc etc. How do you teach an eight-year-old the intrinsic value of hard work, especially in a reward-saturated world? That's not rhetorical, I'm really asking. TELL ME IF YOU KNOW PLEASE FOR REAL.

He has a handful of good kids at school that he buddies around with, and a handful that make me purse my lips, which I assume is about normal and will always be the case. He goes to a super diverse school, so he has friends from all continents and many religions, and is becoming a person who knows how and what to ask people about their heritage, his cultural curiosity unstifled by the fear of being offensive, because he is in relationship with all kinds of kids. I've admired him several times when, for instance, he sees the Asian man playing as a guest violinist from church, and he is happy and friendly to walk up to him and ask him about his instrument, or if his family is from Korea or another place in Asia - and what unfolds is a perfectly natural conversation that isn't about race but also doesn't shy away from it. He takes in stride that some of his Muslim friends pray several times a day during school, or that his Sikh Indian friend wears a turban. He just... casually knows a lot about a variety of things, as we all do about our friends, I suppose, but it's so cool that he lives it and is growing a kind and nuanced language for something we, as a culture, struggle to do, or at least to do well. The kids are all right, as they say. (They give me hope.)

 His favorite school work is science, for sure -- he is curious about the world and nature and animals and astronomy and matter, and loves being able to build some tool or model that will help him test an idea. He also does math extremely well; I kind of can't believe how quickly his little brain can grasp a new concept and be able to apply it. He still likes to read a lot, but mostly for fun; it's not something he seems to want to push himself on. He likes writing stories but prefers... reports. "This is an informational text about x," he tells us on the reg. (It's usually a historical ship, or an animal; yesterday, it was a commodities report about how some virus is affecting coffee beans and the world might be running out of coffee; this is information he thought I would like to know.)

He loves legos, if anything, even more than he has in the past. He is less and less married to the idea of keeping his creations together as they look on the box, and increasingly into making his own designs, or replicating designs he sees in the real world. His need to build things extends beyond legos and now includes a variety of trash, which he raids from the recycling bin, and I am constantly having to gently* urge him to remove the coke can boxes and coffee cans and Gatorade bottles from his room, where they are inevitably taped to each other and to rocks and strings and folded paper, because that's a dinosaur habitat/ ship yard/ new solar system/ airport/ lemur rescue center DUH MOM CAN'T YOU SEE I NEED THAT. (*What, I try.)

Nathan is so independent and helpful at home; he's definitely the chore workhorse of the three kids, and helps his sisters and both Mark and me, so much. He fixes his own breakfast and packs his own lunch (and often helps the girls with both those things) and fancies himself a budding master chef, so he loves to help with dinner too.

He loves his cello and his choir at church, and he loves running. The big kids do a track club every Friday morning before school, and he often gets a couple of miles in, which impresses me. He's also become quite a fast swimmer this summer, which blows my mind a little. Two years ago he couldn't swim at all, and now he's one of the fastest in the pack at his swim meets. He just looks like a swimmer in the water; it's the most athletic thing we have ever seen him do, and it's fun to see him grow in confidence with it.

He's still one of the smallest in his grade, less skin and bones now that he is getting stronger, but still just... short. We've been saying for over a year now that he's due a growth spurt at any moment, but it keeps not coming. So.... yeah? Any day now? I guess? Or maybe never.

He loves minecraft. He films himself talking to the camera for his "youtube channel, please subscribe!" (which is locked to everyone but him, but he can dream of his internet superstardom if he wants). He sends lovely heart-feelings texts and emails. He has a teenager voice he uses to talk on the phone. Has spent the year obsessed with Pokemon, so the current GO trend is blowing his mind and providing some good Daddy-kid bonding time to be out exploring. He plays fine alone but still clings to attention from Anneliese, which often wanes these days, because of Charlotte's equal demand and more interesting (to her) playtime ideas. He is bossy and firm and kind and generous. He remains sensitive, and is easily hurt and offended. He saves his silly side for people he really trusts. He is ever more self-assured, and no longer scared of real conversation with new people, even adults. He is polite and witty and full of fun! facts! and loves studying the giant world atlas that hangs over his bed.

He is a wonderful person, and now I need to go wipe his face with a washcloth and scratch his sicky back and offer him some ice chips. (He's patient zero. Pray for us.)

We love you, sweet Nathan. Happy due date, you excellent human, you.

First Day of School!

Welp, the big kids are off to school. Nathan is in third grade, and Anneliese is in kindergarten, and I am... verklempt.

Look at them! They are such big kids! How did this happen?? I feel like I even had an "extra" year at home with Anneliese, because she's so much older for her school year than the others. And still, it wasn't enough. I miss her.

My heart is squeezed very tight, and my thoughts are across town in her little classroom, and my memories are full of this whole first era of her childhood that's... over. Yes, she is still a child, yes, I will see her all the time, etc etc etc I KNOW. But it really is the end of an era, and that always comes with feelings. Feeeeeeelings. Capital F. You know.

When she was born is when I officially stopped working and became a stay-at-home parent, and now we are entering a season where I will start work again, in some capacity, and there is still so much unknown and unplanned but it really just feels like an era is ending.

Anyway! Brisk clap! Look at this sweet picture of the two of them three years ago, on Nathan's first day of kindergarten and Anneliese's first day of preschool. They are the same! Yet so grown up! Yet still my babies!

2012 and 2015

OH MAH GAH Y'ALL. My heart.

Brb I need to hug my last baby at home and cry weepy mom tears and wait for the bus.

(The bus came. It was the best part of Anneliese's day, she said. After all those years of waving to Nathan, she finally got to ride with him.)

Anyway so yeah. School is back. All the other moms can throw a party but I'm not there yet. Someone send me a hug and a cookie please kthx.

Nathan at Almost 8

Happy July 22nd! It's Nathan's due date! Again! (No, I have not let go of due dates yet. Hush.)

I am full of feelings today, like every year, remembering eight years ago in the final days of being pregnant, before I was officially a mom. This year for the first time, it feels far away, a long time ago, a previous lifetime. Even just last year I would have said it felt like just yesterday, and now in some ways it does, but mostly it feels now like... a memory.

Pregnancy and babies seem far from my life now, suddenly. It's good and bad. Post for another day. Anyway! *brisk clap*

Sweet Nathan will be eight years old this weekend, y'all. EIGHT.

At almost eight he is still into ships, and dinosaurs, and reading anything non-fiction unless I pull teeth to talk him into a novel. Actually, speaking of teeth, he still hasn't lost any since waaaay last May, over a year ago, and one the Christmas before that. I suspect this time next year he will have a mouth full of holes, or maybe even a mouth full of grownup teeth, so this might be the last of his birthday pictures where he looks like a... little kid. *sob*

He is indeed still little; he actually hasn't gotten any taller since last year, and only one pound heavier, which hopefully doesn't mean anything other than 1- he has Mark's tiny tween genes for being the class shrimp, and 2- he is due for a growth spurt any moment now. He is strong though, and can run fast for a long time, and swim for hours, so his skinny little ribs must have some muscle around them.

He is still a tiny pedant, holding people to their time estimates down to the minute, and correcting anything he perceives as a mistake (I sent him a weather channel video of the biggest ship in the world, and was informed that the biggest ship in the world is actually in a different class and company, and *sigh*) (we are working on politeness). We have no idea where he got that know-it-all gene I MEAN REALLY NO IDEA.

He takes himself and others very seriously, but he also has a playful side when he wants to be silly (and then suddenly acts much younger than his age). He is starting to ask to be into The Things of Older Kids - movies he hears about from friends, and video games, and such. We had one painfully awkward but necessary conversation about birds and bees and the ways life is made, after he learned some wrong things on the playground. (Already!) (I KNOW.) (Recording here for posterity's sake: his notion of all of this came thirdhand via friends about Jack and Rose in the engine room on the Titanic YES REALLY.)

Some days it feels like we are on the brink of a new world, one I am in no rush to get to, yet one I know we can't and shouldn't keep him from.

He is a hard worker and gladly does chores and homework and helps his sisters. He remains one of the most generally compliant kids I have ever known. He loves one on one attention and outings, and is crabby when he feels unseen, and would get lost in internet videos about minecraft, and ship histories, and drawing classes, for hours if we'd let him.

He the moodiest person in our house and also probably the kindest. He is cautious and needs to observe things before he tries them, but once he tries something he keeps pushing until he can do it well; he is driven. He tells funny jokes and horrible ones, is ever better at the cello and ever more tone deaf when he sings, and he writes beautifully.

He is a tiny hoarder of all things sentimental: scraps of paper and drawings and postcards and things other people would consider trash are worth keeping, for him. They get pinned to his bulletin board or stuck in boxes and notebooks, or folded and taped and made into new creations, meshed together with legos and stuffed animals for some world he has dreamed up and decided to build. He is an introvert in the truest sense of the definition: only talks about things important to him, not good at surface level conversation, wants and needs lots of time alone to play and re-charge, and will play happily in his room for long windows of time before emerging to show us what he's been building or working on.

He is a night owl like me, and to wind down in the evenings we usually lie in my bed to read by ourselves together. He is also somehow an early riser, motivated more by the promise of having the house to himself, quiet for breakfast and his favorite youtube channels, than by extra sleep. (He is nothing like me in that way.)

He likes yogurt and candy and hot chocolate and coffee and cheese and crackers and oatmeal and mashed potatoes with gravy. He loves snuggling. He adores his sisters. He texts people the most precious and lovely parts of his heart, things he could or would never say out loud.

He is a wonderful little human, and it's an honor to be his mom, the one who made me a mom, almost eight years ago. Amazing.

Faith Timeline

Our church does a series of workshops for second graders, for "welcoming children to worship," which I have many Opinions about, but let's just suffice it to say: I think second graders are way too old to be "welcomed" into worship (could/should be much much younger than that), and if we are going to do a weeks-long education and welcome, we could do it a lot better than we do. (Nathan literally learned nothing new. Know where learned about worship? IN WORSHIP. Where he has been for YEARS.) (But! Maybe it was great or helpful for some other people. I don't want to discount that. Also I don't want to take on the whole re-thinking of what/how they do what they do, so I am shutting up.)

ANYWAY.

As part of the workshop, they did some good activities with the kids and parents together, and one of them was for Nathan to make a timeline of his faith, with Mark and me helping note important markers - like his baptism, or when he started sunday school, or started singing in choir, or when he will do communion and confirmation and such.

But besides those more obvious ones, we talked through lots of ideas, and the things important enough to make it onto his faith timeline are things like:
- the first time he held a real candle on Christmas Eve
- when he started sitting in the chancel area with me (in the choir) on Sunday mornings when Mark isn't there
- when he sat at the organ in worship (with Another Nathan)
- the first time he went to Montreat

It's really lovely to see the things that he has noticed and internalized and assigned meaning to. I like seeing our traditional/educational/parental ideas of what makes an important milestone, all mashed up together with his. I think it's cool and I think it's beautiful, and he makes me melt.

First Day of Second Grade

Nathan started second grade today, y'all. SECOND GRADE. Every year I am all-caps shocked that he is a year older, a grade ahead in school, etc etc, and I am going to go ahead and assume now, three kids and seven years into this parenting thing, that that will never stop.

SECOND. GRADE.

(He spilled hot chocolate on those yellow shorts he was so insistent on wearing for his first day, which he also insisted on putting on before drinking said hot chocolate, even though someone super smart *ahem* advised against it, and fifteen minutes before we took this photo, there was a little bit of eye rolling and laundering-by-baby-wipe-and-hair-dryer, but it worked out okay. For his shorts. Which he loves. So.)

So he was very excited and easy about his first day, but he did want me to drive him. And then he wanted me to come in with him (Mark is out of town so that meant parking several blocks away and schlepping all four kids inside, which went better than I expected, actually), and then he was a little teary and wanted extra hugs, but then he was excited and fine again.

He has a desk! Inside which he can put books and notebooks and and and! (Not just a table.) His favorite friend from last year is in his class again, and his teacher-to-be is on maternity leave, but I am trying to have faith that the interim situation will be sorted out and he will be none worse for the wear. And in the meantime, desks!

So we got him settled, and then I buckled the other kids into the minivan, instagrammed a picture of him, and drove through starbucks with my back-to-school tears, because I am a mom cliche.

SECOND! GRADE!

Favorites (Movie) Party, and a Sperm Whale Cake

So, here's a fun thing to blog about in an emotional roller coaster of week/weekend: we had a super sweet birthday party with Nathan yesterday! He had asked several months ago to do a movie party, which sounded easy and fun enough -- and got even better when Another Nathan said we could reserve his neighborhood's clubhouse movie theater for our own private show. Fun, right?! (Also free free free YES PLEASE.)

He went round and round and round about what kind of party he wanted, and even when I assured him he didn't need a theme or anything ( theme could just be "hey it's your birthday come watch a movie and have cake"), he still kept debating on what kiiiind of party it would be, and at some point he started referring to it as a Favorite Party, which would have all of his favorite things:

- legos

- sperm whales

- dinosaurs

- space

- friend cars

I mean, if that right there isn't a cohesive party theme, I don't know what is. Someone hire me to plan their event. It will totally make sense. Swearsies.

So we did it. We had a party with all of those things. Dinosaur balloons and napkins, and friend car plates, and a planets tablecloth (which I just now remembered I forgot to even use, ha whoops), and we watched the lego movie, and I made a sperm whale cake. The blasted sperm whale cake that he asked me for many weeks ago, and I had no idea where to start with, and eventually I landed on a really complicated solution:

Step 1- Make a cake.

Step 2- Put a sperm whale on top of the cake.

HI THERE AM GENIUS I CAN HAZ MOM TROPHY.

So actually it ended up being an adorable (very random, but adorable) party. He had a few friends from church, one from school, and even one he met last week at Montreat, who told Nathan he thought he lived in Durham, and since Nathan thought he lived in Raleigh, it worked out for them to go to each other's parties (zomg adorbz). They all ate pizza and had popcorn from the theater's popcorn stand/kettle/thing, and played with glow sticks, and watched the movie, and then opened presents and ate cake. 

favor bags with Nathan's "favorites" --
pack of legos, toy whale, dino eraser, Cars candy, in a space bag

the sperm whale cake --
which I'm sure is how I will remember this birthday

After the party, the birthday boy spent the afternoon swimming in the backyard with Uncle Nick and Aunt Barbara, and then we had a family dinner at his restaurant of choice -- McDonald's. He also opened a stack of fun presents from us and from grandparents, the most notable of which seems to be this GINORMOUS sperm whale, which is just what every kid needs for bedtime snuggling?

(He adores it, obviously.) (Yes, that is a squid for it to hunt. Or, if you're Anneliese, a friend to help it find rainbows. So.)

May all birthdays be so random yet so successful. Cheers to SEVEN!

Nathan is 7! Happy Birthday!

Nathan is seven years old today! Happy birthday, little one. Your age sounds dangerously close to big-kid territory, but you will always be my sweet baby boy in my eyes. We love you more than you can even wrap your adorable fact-loving brain around. So, so much.


(If you can't see the embedded video, click here to watch on YouTube.)

Memory lane video links:
Sixth year
Fifth year
Fourth year
Third year
Second year
First year

First Swimmers

Happy July! Is it July already? *cue freakout*

All of our pool time (and the bribery promise of any frozen/lego/cars toy they want) has brought some real progress on the swimming front for Nathan and Anneliese. Progress as in, THEY CAN DO IT.

I mean, there is no good stroke work going here, or anything fancy, but they are letting go of the wall and the bottom and moving their bodies in the water, willingly, without help, and OH MAH GAH I'M SO PROUD. (And relieved. This is a big safety thing for me.)

Anneliese did it first, on Sunday:


(If you can't see the embedded video, click here to watch on YouTube.)

And then Nathan, in a burst of "can't let little sister outdo me," did it today. It's all in the legs for him, apparently:


(If you can't see the embedded video, click here to watch on YouTube.)

(We actually don't hate that Anneliese did it first. According to my sources, middle kids hardly get to do anything first. Also, she is (most of the time) a wee but more confident than Nathan, so seeing her do it was good motivation and reassurance for him. Peer pressure in the best way.

They will also both go underwater for diving rings (mostly just off the steps) and just in general are not freaking the eff out about getting their faces and heads wet. It is huge progress for these kids who are slow to catch up to their water-loving genes, apparently.

Oh! And baby Ali had her first swim too! In our pool! (Both our girls had their first swims in Uncle Nick's pool, so this was a sweet turnabout.) Considering how much she likes to yell about life, we weren't sure that she would be very happy about swimming, but she loooved it.  Stayed happy and content in the water for a good long while. She was squishy and slippery and drippy and oh so sweet.

It has been an emotionally wrought few days around here, nothing having anything to do with the kids, so seeing them be summery and proud and determined is basically the best thing ever. It makes me teary.

Daily Goettsch, December Edition with a Lost Tooth

This is how you blog when you're in a December frenzy: already-shared happy moments from the month!

Gray days have nothing on Anneliese.

Charlotte apparently thinks my driving needs a two-handed ridealong grip. Okay kid. Okay now.

And Nathan finally lost his first tooth! (Confession: we barely knew it was loose.)

He has been waiting for this since halfway through last school year, and finally he joins the ranks of his friends with a hole in his mouth and a matching lisp which makes me both happy and sad at the same time. We have had a rough weekend with this one, but glad for his moment tonight and ready to start fresh tomorrow. Parenting, man.

First Day of First Grade

Well Nathan started first grade today. It is... okay. Very okay, I think.

Last night I was all awash in feelings because HI HAVE YOU MET ME and it's the end of summer, which felt like the end of an era, the end of my full-time parenting with him, and will he even need me anymore and yes yes yes this is a familiar rabbit hole I am in, right?

I was thinking that last year starting kindergarten would feel like The Big Adjustment but nope! It turns out that kindergarten for half a day, at our church, feels way more comfortable and familiar than what we're doing now. This new school is all day, across town, and it feels like... not my turf. On several levels. I feel kind of removed from it all. Which is normal! Appropriate! But is definitely a new step considering I have been the one managing most of his days since he popped out six years ago.

I spent a lot of his first day staring at the wall wondering what he was doing at school. I kept thinking to myself now what? which is DUMB because I have TWO OTHER CHILDREN here who are clinging to me and aren't ready for all-day separation like Nathan is (and I know he is! it is a good thing!) but STILL.

Independence is weird, yo.

Anyway. First day.

We went shopping last week to get everything on his supply list, which is SO FUN. (If you are nostalgic for that awesome back-to-school feeling, I highly recommend having a kid and living vicariously.) We also had quite a hunt for the perfect first-day "button shirt with sleeves for to roll" (nothing has ever been more Nathan than the way he describes clothes). He finally found one that he liked, I didn't love, I splurged on it anyway, then brought home a random polo a different day just to have in general, and he proclaimed that one his first day shirt, which.. really? Are you sure? Okay then.

Except then went outside for his first-day pics and said hm maybe it's a little cool out and I will choose the button one after all OH NO YOU DON'T MY DARLING FIRST GRADER.

So we took some pictures, we cried a few tears, and we brought him to school.

We walked him to his class and kissed him and waved bye from the door and he only tried to shoo us away once.

And just like that, our newborn baby boy has officially started school. Like, school-school.

Oh man. Here we go.

Dinosaur Pool Party

Nathan and I are headed to Montreat for a week for a youth conference, and Montreat (from what I can tell after two short afternoon visits last summer and last week) is where the internet goes to die. So who knows when this will be actually posted complete with pictures.

But. Nonetheless. We had a dinosaur pool party!

Yep, that is what Nathan asked for. Mark and I didn't know what it meant either. But it turned out very okay!

Inflatable dinosaurs! In a pool! What is a dinosaur pool party if not EXACTLY THIS?!

We cut slices of pizza into dino shapes with cookie cutters. Note: this is not for the faint of heart. Pizza-cookie-cutting is approximately one million times trickier than you are picturing it in your mind. I know, because I pictured it that way too. Um, nope.

I made adorable (if I can say so) (yep, I can) favor bags from foam masks. I loved them. They were maybe my favorite thing all day. Besides Nathan. Of course. My sweet big boy six-year-old. Okay whatever LOOK AT MY DINO BAGS THEY ARE SUPER.

Charlotte adopted and rode a new pet. You know, like you do.

We set up the table outside with paper and dino stencils and things to color.

We made a dinosaur cake complete with rocks and dirt, obtained in the form of toppings from a pay-by-the-ounce frozen yogurt place where Mark went and bought... just toppings. Parenting makes you do weird things, yo.

This is a portrait I like to call "Birthday Happy Frantic with Daddy and Paralophosaurus" (heck yes I know dinosaur names) (no I just flat-out lied, I had to ask Nathan before typing that) (and then google for spelling) (I am a sham of a dino-lover mother, is what I'm saying).

And then we opened presents and played. Oh and yes those are indeed dinosaur bones in that bowl. Thank goodness for Pinterest or I would have just thought they were yogurt pretzels. NOPE! Dinosaur bones.

Happy dino pool birthday, dear Nathansaurus.

Nathan is Six!

Happy birthday to our oldest baby, whom I feel could have just been a tiny baby last week but somehow it has actually been six years, who is now bright and kind and uncertain and excitable and gentle and curious and empathetic and funny and shy, all at once.


(If you can't see the embedded video, click here to watch it on YouTube.)

(And because I know some of you love memory lane as much as I do: here are links for Nathan's fifth, fourth, third, second, and first years too.)

We love you so much, sweet Nathan. Happy birthday to you.

Almost Six: HI My Blog by Nathan

{Royal baby or not, to me July 22 will always be Nathan's due date. Happy almost-six to my sweet baby boy! I was going to write an update on how he is doing at almost six, but he has been working on this for a month, he said last week he was done, and I thought this would be a good time to post it. So, here you go: baby's first blog post!}

The titel is HI my Blog by Nathan

HI my Nam is Nathan i m Email a blog.

My brthae is Just a feu mare days. i will be six yers old. my brthae pRtey will be a dinosur poul pRtey weth six frends boys and grels!

i Love Rex. Rex is fun he is my vare sof t-rex. he is my fevrit toy i can Have 1 speshal toy that is not for to shar. Mr Roger said that. Allso Tiger is my speshal fevrit toy that is not for to shar.

haveing tow sistrs is fun! Ther Nam is Annelieses and Charliett. they aer pritete and smart sistrs i Lik to hug tham i can pik up Charliett isNt that so fune! Charliett sez her Nam is nite nite isNt that so fune!

My fevrits things are LEGOS and dinosurs and plaenets and puZelz. My fevrit sho is Daniel and Super Why and the cat in the hat nose all abowt that! and dinosur traine.

We seed a snake owtside but it was not peosnus my mom hit it weth the shuvL. 

did you no that astro nots war Diprs in Spas! isNt that so fune!

If you cant find some Thing jus thingck Like a Skewrl! Becus Skewrls can all ways remembire and find ther Akorns.

By Nathan!

Last Kindergarten Chapel

The last day of school! Finally! Maybe I'm being naive, but I am so ready to have all the kids home every day for the summer. Nowhere to be by any certain time which I will certainly feel late for! No more fighting for parking for school dropoff! PJs all day! (Well, some days.) Playtime at home! NO MORE PACKING LUNCHES!

Okay so yay summer break, but before we celebrate can I just be nostalgic for a second? Anneliese is done with her first year of preschool. Nathan is done with kindergarten, and graduating out of our church school for good.  Look how far they have come in a year:

And in case you thought those two were looking too old, try not to freak out at how huge Charlotte is all of a sudden. Um, excuse me? When did that happen?

(Also, oh my sweet babies, you are so perfectly and wonderfully awkward. Never change.)

Nathan is all dressed up because the last day of school was his final "graduation" chapel. I tried not to be too emotional but the second he walked downstairs with his tie on and asked for help with his sleeves, I was crying. And kept going off and on until chapel was over.

So, that's how that went.

And of course he wanted Daddy to wear his matching tie. Which of course Daddy happily did.

We are hella in love with this awesome kid. He is so bright and incredibly kind. He is still a budding introvert, but ever more confident, and I can't believe how far he has come out of his shell in the past year or so. I am both terrified and proud to send him to a big public school this fall.

We love you, Nathan. So much. Congrats, little graduate.

And now, summer.