Happy 7th Birthday, Charlotte!

Charlotte Booler is 7 today! Happy birthday, baby girl!

She doesn't know it yet, but when we wake up in the morning, we are taking her to the American Girl Store (we drove to Charlotte, which is the closest storefront to us, to spend the night with my mom and put us closer) and letting her finally FINALLY get an American Girl doll, which she has been coveting for literal years. After wandering the Chicago store last summer, she knows exactly which one she wants, and we have two aunts meeting us there for a tea party/ lunch in the doll cafe (I DO NOT EVEN KNOW WHO I AM ANYMORE), and I am actually legit excited to finally give her this thing she has wanted for so long. (There has been a "responsibility" requirement for such an expensive doll in our family, which she has... um... taken a few extra years to show she can handle.)

Anyway. Doll me strength. Happy doll lunch birthday to this child who has big-girl interests and somehow isn't in a bumbo seat drooling on herself anymore. I know, it's weird how that happened.

Seven!

Charlotte at 7 is a gappy-toothed bubbly chatty funny delight. She has no shortage of personality, and though she still hasn't really ever met a stranger, she's become sliiiiightly more guarded with who gets to see her truly silly side. She loves dancing in her room, lip syncing with a hairbrush, and filming herself talking to the camera about all manner of nothing (as if she's a youtuber, which she longs to be, which I will not allow, despite the hours of footage added up on all our devices showing her life dream about this).

She's a night owl and an early riser, both. She's a lefty who loves drawing and writing her name on everything. She loves puzzles and math. Her favorite mammal is a sheep but her favorite SEA-mammal is a narwhal, and her favorite overall animal is a penguin. (She really likes animals.)

She took a sign language elective at school last year, and now loves signing. She's on a quest to learn more, and notices sign language now everrrrywhere, tons of places I had never noticed myself. She says when she grows up, she wants to be a person who signs sermons in church (or an artist. one of those).

She loves Beanie Boos, and will recite a list of the ones she owns, in order of acquisition, to anyone who will listen. (I don't recommend listening to this, unless you have, like, very specific insomnia needs.)

She reports that the best new places she went this year were a Disney Cruise, and (finally!) Montreat. Of all our kids, she's the one who most craves a new adventure, which is really fun for me, since it feels like a little bit of me, connecting to her in that way.

She didn't do dance this year, because she was a bit overwhelmed at starting a full-day school schedule, and it was all just... too much. (To this I say: YEP I GET IT ME TOO.) She does miss having an activity though, so she will start gymnastics with Anneliese this fall. She also loves running (and is fast!) and finally this winter learned to swim. It's amazing how fast and strong her swimming is now, just a few months later. (However, she doesn't want to be called "quite the little fish" but "quite the little narwhal." Please to make a note.)

She and Anneliese have become thick as thieves this year, which is really fun to see. (Well, really fun insofar as the bickering doesn't exhaust me, because they are very much thieves of the bickering ilk.) When Nathan is home, she sort of has to vy for Anneliese's attention and affection, but most often she can fit right into the group dynamic, and the girls find lots of moments for sister time with dolls and dancing and whatever camping show they're into watching together these days.

Sometimes parenting Charlotte feels like a whole new beast to Mark and me. She's somehow cut from a very different cloth than the other two (I know, I know, all children are different), and it once in a while renders us feeling like hopeless newbies at this whole thing, even though we're over a decade in and she's our third kid. Those days and weeks and spells are... hard. She has her own mind, and knowing what the expectations are, and what the right thing to do is, isn't *always* enough to convince her to do it. But MOST of the time, she is wonderful and quirky and funny and sweet, always the first one who wants to snuggle or have special time one on one with us, often the first who wants to help in the kitchen, the least complainy about chores and cleaning, and these days the best eater in the house (whoa). She is becoming more confident in her needs and her gifts, and it's super cool to see her becoming the person she will be.

For now, we'll settle into watching her be seven. We'll spend the day doll shopping and eating chocolate cheesecake (her request). We'll delight in this little Booler, and be so joyful that we get to know her and love her. It seems only a moment ago, the idea of a third baby was so hypothetical, just a lark of a hope, and now she's here and human and funny and HER. She made and makes our family complete, and we love her like the sun.

Happy birthday, dear Charlotte. We love you so much, forever and ever, baby Booler.

Memories from Charlotte's 7th year:



(If you can't see the embedded video, click here to watch on YouTube.)

And from years past:

Sixth year
Fifth year
Fourth year
Third year
Second year
First year

Happy 11th Birthday, Nathan!

Welp, Nathan is eleven!

The tiny baby who came home to two mostly-clueless parents and two pups who thought they were human, the baby who inspired the move of Erin's Official Internet Sharings from, like, long emails and LiveJournals and MySpace to HERE IN YE LITTLE CORNER OF THE WEBZ which has already somehow aged itself out of usefulness in keeping up with the times but I can't quite quit it anyway -- yeah, THAT little newborn baby is now eleven.

Eleven!

Happy birthday, baby Nathan!

He started middle school this week (magnet school with a modified schedule starts early and ends early each year). He's still doing orchestra, and loving science and design things, is doing a geometric construction class (?) (something about math and buildings) and also digital literacy (because 2018) and Chinese and all sorts of big-kid things.

He has reached the age of into-every-sport, thinks he is destined to be a great football star (he has never played football, never, not once, but he will be trying it this fall) (the flag variety, I'm not nuts y'all, PLEZ), is actually a really fast swimmer, likes running, and wears out athletic shoes faster than he outgrows them (he's still the smallest kid in his grade) (best of luck with those football dreams, buddy). He has fallen hard for the Croatian national soccer team, the Twins (?) and the Vikings (???) - but is most enthused about Clemson football, because, yknow, Dad time.

He tells jokes that actually (sometimes) have a real punchlines that are (somewhat) funny. He is too old for Daniel Tiger but not too old for Cars and Toy Story. He isn't yet too cool for snuggling. THANK THE LORD AMIRITE?! He loves his little sisters and his little cousins and is compliant and responsible and polite, and only shows signs of teen 'tude when he's overstimulated or beyond his introvert limits (but is better than many adults at recognizing that and escaping for a bit to recharge).

He is bossy but we have no idea where he gets that. *shrug*  *cringe*

His YouTube history is still full of dinosaur documentaries and info about maritime history, now with a smattering of Two Cellos, The Piano Guys, Imagine Dragons, Minecraft how-tos, sportsball highlights, kid chef/cooking shows, drawing tutorials, and Try Not to Laugh videos. (Spoiler alert: he usually laughs. Often at o' dark thirty in the morning when I am trying to sleep late.) (Someone wake me when my mom of the year trophy arrives.)

We got him a cell phone earlier this summer, for the advent of middle school (he'll eventually be taking a city bus home, and I need to text him and also track his every location and move like any millenial parent, duh) and as we were setting up our family cell phone rules, and talking about not disparaging other people or excluding them or saying unkind or untrue things about them, etc - he said "so basically, be a a Hufflepuff?" YES, BUDDY. YES. BE A HUFFLEPUFF.

And he is. Through and through. He seeks to include, he clamors for what's fair (to the point where his exacting nature is sometimes exhausting for me), he is empathetic and kind and funny, and just a truly wonderful little human.

I felt a LOT of feelings this past Sunday, his due date, the night before he started middle school. I cried all my tears and missed his infant self and I think I have that out of my system for the moment, because right now all I can think about is how great he is, how glad I am I know him, and how amazed and grateful I am that we get to be his parents.

Happy birthday, dear Nathan. We love you so much. xoxo


(Click here to watch the embedded video above on YouTube.)


Memory lane:

Nathan's 10th year
9th year
8th year
7th year
6th year
5th year
4th year
3rd year
2nd year
1st year (omg   *sob emoji*)

Happy Birthday, Charlotte!

I am posting this in the wee hours of Charlotte's 5th birthday, from the beach, our annual trip with my dad. This is our second year on the road for her special day. Basically she's going to start expecting a trip every year for her birthday, and I will have very wide eyes (and say no) (but secretly want to say yes).

She was really excited to claim a top bunk when we got here today, something she quickly named as her birthday right (she didn't get a top bunk at GWL for Nathan's birthday, and has been talking about it ever since). But some hours after bedtime she got scared up high, appeared for several "bathroom breaks," one of which ended in tears and fears -- so we did a bed shuffle and now she is sound asleep beside me, my sweet baby girl who wants to be a big girl but clearly still isn't, in so many ways.

Oh, my heart.

So while I am busy having difficulty comprehending the passing of time, and also that my child is five, my youngest baby, and thinking about how much a youngest baby growing up just wreaks havok on the mom feels -- as I'm thinking about all that, I am also just now remembering I intended to make a cake tonight, and whoops! Got distracted by ice cream and the Olympics and totally forgot. It's nothing that I can't do in the morning, of course -- our "party" plans for the day are very vague, because, yknow, vacation -- but it just goes to show that while youngest kids can pull extra at your heartstrings, they also get a teensy bit forgotten. POOR THIRD CHILD, ETC.

But she is indeed five, and she will have cake, and the cake will be wearing sunglasses, I think? I hope? and she does squeeze my heart, this little Booler. She is growing up right before our eyes; most days it feels like the perfect balance of happy/sad.

Some of my favorites from the last year:


If you can't see the embeded video, click here to watch on YouTube.

(If you love memory lane like I do, here are her first, second, third, and fourth years too.)

Oh sweet little girl, I both ache for your diminishing babyness, and love the race into your big-kid-ness. I love you more than you can ever know. Keep dancing, every time you feel a dance in you. This year and always.

Happy birthday, dear Charlotte.

Happy Birthday, Anneliese!

It's Anneliese's birthday! She's six! SIX! It sounds so old, doesn't it?

Another year has flown by:


(If you can't see the embedded video, click here to watch on YouTube.)

(Other birthday videos: first year, second year, third year, fourth year, fifth year.)

It always makes me a bit sad and nostalgic watching my babies grow up, and watching all the past years of birthday videos makes me full of sappy tears and memories. There an ache to it, of course. But mostly, today, it's a warm ache, tempered by the lovely feelings of watching her grow into a person I really like and respect. She is a wonderful child, the world is better with her in it, and it is an honor to be her mom. My heart is full to bursting.

Happy happy birthday, dear Anneliese.

First Day of School!

Welp, the big kids are off to school. Nathan is in third grade, and Anneliese is in kindergarten, and I am... verklempt.

Look at them! They are such big kids! How did this happen?? I feel like I even had an "extra" year at home with Anneliese, because she's so much older for her school year than the others. And still, it wasn't enough. I miss her.

My heart is squeezed very tight, and my thoughts are across town in her little classroom, and my memories are full of this whole first era of her childhood that's... over. Yes, she is still a child, yes, I will see her all the time, etc etc etc I KNOW. But it really is the end of an era, and that always comes with feelings. Feeeeeeelings. Capital F. You know.

When she was born is when I officially stopped working and became a stay-at-home parent, and now we are entering a season where I will start work again, in some capacity, and there is still so much unknown and unplanned but it really just feels like an era is ending.

Anyway! Brisk clap! Look at this sweet picture of the two of them three years ago, on Nathan's first day of kindergarten and Anneliese's first day of preschool. They are the same! Yet so grown up! Yet still my babies!

2012 and 2015

OH MAH GAH Y'ALL. My heart.

Brb I need to hug my last baby at home and cry weepy mom tears and wait for the bus.

(The bus came. It was the best part of Anneliese's day, she said. After all those years of waving to Nathan, she finally got to ride with him.)

Anyway so yeah. School is back. All the other moms can throw a party but I'm not there yet. Someone send me a hug and a cookie please kthx.

Road Trip, Days 1-2: Millers Creek, Tweetsie Railroad

Y'all. Remember how I drove up the country last summer with Another Nathan, and it proved delightful? I tempted fate and did it again. This time with Marky and all the kids. Intentionally slowly, with many stops along the way, making a vacation out of it, and you know what?

IT WAS DELIGHTFUL AGAIN.

I know, I kind of can't believe it either. Except I can. Let this be a public service message to people with toddlers, doing nightly rounds of abject weeping about the state of chaos: it gets better. Babies are cute but big kids are awesome. You can throw them in the car and drive around the country and all fully enjoy each other. I know. I KNOW.

Anyway. Now backdated, but here goes.

Yes, yes we did buy a selfie stick.

Day 1: Millers Creek, NC

We spent the first night on the road at my Grandpa's farm. I was so full of feelings, knowing it would be the last night ever to be there, since he died earlier this summer. Grandpa built the house himself, in the 50s, when my dad was just a toddler and they were living in what's now the rec room as he added onto the rest. My dad and aunt grew up here, and as grandkids we had so many summer and Christmas visit memories, and it's such a special place. I was glad for one more night to wander through and smell the smells and touch the counters and books and furniture, and cry a little. It's beautiful.

We also had Igloo hot dogs and ice cream for dinner, because obviously.

Day 2: Tweetsie Railroad! 

(This is an amusement park. It's named after a train that used to go over the mountains between NC and TN. I had no idea how many people didn't know what I was talking about when I posted this on facebook. It's just... a train themed, wild west expansion themed, slightly politically incorrect amusement park.)

Okay, so my previously nervous children have apparently become Amusement Park People this year. My dad took Nathan and Anneliese to Carowinds earlier this summer, and they rode a ton of rides, and generally became fearless (??) so when we were at Tweetsie, they clamored to do things that, a year ago, I would never have dreamed they'd be interested in.

Look at this! It's a thing that drops from the sky! Anneliese basically bounded onto it. What??

Also Nathan and Anneliese rode this fast spinny thing many many many times, and never looked less happy/thrilled than they do right here:

Even Charlotte was quite insistent on any ride she was tall enough to get on.

(She also walked straight into a beam and conked her head got a giant goose egg, so some things stay super normal even on vacation.)

We rode a chair lift and I only freaked out a tiny bit. Nathan and Anneliese rode the spinning teacup thing at least ten times, enough that Mark and I had to bail and watch from the sidelines because we were done. (See? Big kids! Best!)

Oh! And there was a little petting zoo area, where you could pay fifty cents and get some feed for some animals, and they told us to please try not to let the goats out (!!!) and also don't pick them up (!!!!!!) and we didn't know what they meant until we got inside and there's like... goats wandering around. Not in pens but on the sidewalk. Like puppies. (It was surprisingly hard not to pick one up. I can see why they had to ask people.

Anyway so my suddenly fearless children are not only not scared of rides, but now not scared of animals they don't know. Apparently. They happily fed goats and lamas and alpacas and all manner of petting zoo creatures. From! Their! Hands!

Also, we sat in a covered wagon and I joked that that was all I even needed from a road trip so we could just go home now, and the kids pleaded with me not to, because they are very serious humans, apparently.  So earnest! I WAS KIDDING, DEAR CHILDREN.

And then we drove down the mountain (this portion of our trip sponsored by Dramamine) and drove north and west.

We stopped at a rest stop at the Kentucky line for dinner from the cooler, including monster apples I had purchased on the sly at Tweetsie.

We made it a few more hours, as far as Lexington, and we stopped for the night. We threw the kids in bed and high-fived oursleves on pricelining a great hotel suite and for remembering to put beers in the cooler at the rest stop. Cheers!

Aaaaaand I thought I was going to write our whole northbound journey in one blog post, but HAHAHAHAHA *wipes tear* y'all knew I couldn't do that, right? Stay tuned.

Nathan is Eight! Happy Birthday!

I can't believe it's true, but baby Nathan is officially eight today! When I look at his newborn pictures (as I do every year on his birthday, don't we all do that?) it is harder and harder for me to reconcile that tiny little boy with the puckered mouth and half-closed eyelids and mess of dark hair, with the blonde serious bright boy in our house today.

Where in the world have these years gone?

As always, here is a birthday video of Nathan over the last year:


(If you can't see the embedded video, click here to watch it on YouTube.)

And, as always, the links for all the previous ones. Oh, my memories. My little one, who made me a mommy.

Nathan's first year
Second year
Third year
Fourth year
Fifth year
Sixth year
Seventh year

Hey sweet buddy, as much as we loved you that first July 26th, we love you even more every birthday and every day and every year that has passed since then. Happy birthday, dear Nathan.

Twelve Quick Takes for Summer Break

1.) Reading outside. I make such a habit of sitting or walking outside for a while every day (sunshine is good for my soul, also it's my hippie Sleep Plan attempt at making the days bright and the nights dim, in my never-ending quest to sleep better), and often it's to read, that it seems the kids have picked up on the habit. On library day a few weeks ago when I chased them outside, they did... this.

I tried not to look at their pillows on the ground and just decided to feel happy they were all reading and quiet.

2.) Better swimming. I can't believe that this time last year, none of the kids would even put their face in the water happily, much less let go and swim on their own. Now Nathan and Anneliese are both little fishies, with endless energy and bravery, and Charlotte (with her puddle jumper on) will go anywhere in the pool too, for hours. Until she's exhausted, clearly.

when you're swimming with your thumb in your mouth, it's time to be done

Nathan has gotten to be a really decent diver, too! I'm legit impressed with this. Mad props to his teacher whoever that was. *brushes shoulders*


(If you can't see the video embedded above, click here to watch on YouTube.)

There was a time when I was worried about owning a pool, and now I never want to live without one again.

3.) Duck Donuts. We found a new (to us) donut place where every donut is made to order. Which means you pick your frosting or glaze, and whatever sprinkes/nuts/sugar topping you want, and they serve it to you warm and ooey gooey with a fork.

I'm not a huge donut person, but this is really excellent. RECOMMEND.

4.) Noemi. The fabulous Noemi came over (and we went once to her house) and, well, fabulous Noemi is fabulous. She is fun and funny and her kids behave and are polite and adorable and she's just generally excellent to have around, and she better watch her ass or I will smother in my attempts to conquer her friendship heart and she will have to awkwardly pretend she doesn't know me. Not that it will come to that.

5.) Yay marriage! Mark and I finally had that anniversary date we missed on father's day. And it ended up being on the same day that marriage equality passed nationwide. What a great day to celebrate marriage, amiright? Cheers, everyone! Everyone!

And happy dozen years to the best person I could hope to share this life with.

6.) Booler bruise. Charlotte fell off her bed, and apparently she landed on her... chin? I don't even know with this girl. She is my delicate flower who bruises and breaks and seems to fragile, or maybe just klutzy, or yeah I don't know. Another booler injury for the record books. It turned all sorts of colorful shades for several weeks before it finally went away.

7.) Paper chain. Anneliese made a paper chain to count down the days to Montreat. There are links on that chain with labels like "grandpa" and "Another Nathan" and "skate camp" to mark the time and plans for the month. I guess this is as good a calendar as any, when you're five?

When she and Nathan were at Grandpa's house, Charlotte took over tearing a link each day. She took her responsibility very seriously. (And yes I am aware of the irony of letting any of my kids, especially my breakable delicate flower stand on the very ledge from where Anneliese fell and smashed her face all those years ago.)

8.) Ice skating camp. Yes, Anneliese did a day camp for ice skating. We had her signed up for something different, and then it got changed, and then she reminded me she had liked skating when we tried it back in February, so she suggested ice skating camp instead. Um, okay.

It's the most random thing. We are not a people of ice. Or skates. But I do love about her that she is willing to try new things she knows nothing about, and assumes it will be fine. I like that she wants to do her own thing. And she did great, made new friends, and by the end of the week she was super proud of herself for being able to skate without holding on to anything.

On the last day, they had the option to skate a little "program" where they choose a song and skate around by themselves for the parents. She thought she was doing it, but apparently she didn't sign up in time, so she didn't, and was sad, but then when I saw how she "skates" I realized she could never have done a whole song:


(If you can't see the video embedded above, click here to watch it on YouTube.)

But! So proud! She is so proud, y'all.

9.) Two-piece swimsuit. Her best friend has a two-piece tankini, and she asked for one on repeat forever, so we found one that isn't triangle cut on top, doesn't have a skimpy back, doesn't show her belly, and comes in rainbow colors. It was a quest. She is now happy.

10.) Bee stings. One more about Anneliese, apparently. Mark and I went to dinner tonight and the kids were playing at Nick and Barbara's house, and apparently there were suddenly bees, and one of them got in Anneliese's shirt, and she came away with like ten stings or something. She was fairly traumatized. Apparently some of the the bees even followed them into the house! (They ended up eating pizza for dinner on the floor of Ali's nursery to hide from them.) Props to Uncle Nick who took a few stings himself trying to get Anneliese away. Oh man.

11.) Sardi's Den. A restaurant that Mark and I loved when we lived in Clemson just opened up a branch in Raleigh, and we took Charlotte there for dinner. Ribs and backyard punch! Was really fun and tasted like memories of our early months of marriage.

12.) VCS. We survived another year of vacation church school! This year instead of teaching my own class, I did a variety of a/v tasks to run the assembly each day, and compiled a slideshow video for the last session as always, and did a rotating science teacher thing where we taught about movement and reactions by building lava lamps and playing a catapult game. Was fun and also unbloggably annoying in some moments, but mostly it's a really great week every year.

I took our annual pic in the matching shirts, but before I could get everyone to smile, I got them to frown for a few tries.

Let's just take another look at Charlotte's face here.

Excellent, yes? Yes.

My Grandpa B

My Grandpa Bumgarner would have been ninety today. He died several weeks ago, after a very fast illness and an emotional move to a hospice unit, and everyone racing to Charlotte to say goodbye while he was in good spirits. He was, and we did, and I will always be grateful for that; it's something I didn't get with any of my other grandparents.

I have been short on words about all of this in the last few weeks, but some nice things were said on facebook and instagram and at his service. It has been nice to feel close to my family and sit in this together.

Grandpa was special to all of us. He was a get-down-on-the-floor-and-play kind of grandpa, he loved babies (maybe because he couldn't hear well) (ha) (can we joke yet? say yes) and he loved Anneliese especially, because she's the first one who would happily run to him for a hug on request. He always kept a fridge full of mountain dew and he made the best egg salad ever. He ate cookies and ice cream every night. 

He was a kind stand-in grandparent for Marky, who adored him. He read every word of this blog, on paper that my dad printed and brought to his house, and he liked to tell me he never knew what the hell I was talking about. :) He fought at Iwo Jima and lost friends and was brave when he should have still been a child. He was funny and southern and loyal and worked his ass off.

We loved him, and we miss him. Happy birthday, Grandpa.

2014: Mono, Minnesota, Ali

2014, In Review!

What did you do in 2014 that you'd never done before?
- Got mono, at the age of 33, which is unheard of. 
- Wrangled four kids at once, on the reg.
- Read books on a kindle, on the reg.
- Drove across the country for three days with my best friend, which is a thing I will recommend anyone do. 
- Abandoned the car in the snow and walked with three kids to safety, which is a thing I do not recommend. 

Did you keep last year's resolutions, and will you make more for this year?
     I am fairly certain I never made them last year. This year, I would like to get a real job again, I think.

How did you spend New Year's Eve? 
     I juuuust blogged about NYE so I am changing the question. I just asked Anneliese what she would ask someone about their year and she said What's your favorite thing you ate? 
     (She would like you to know hers was "that spaghetti Daddy makes for me, and also when I had that piece of gum that one time.") I... don't know what mine is. I did have some amaaaahzing, like, close-your-eyes-and-moan-good roasted brussels sprouts with chestnuts and pork belly and apples and a mustard vinaigrette on New Year's Eve, so maybe that? (And, we're back to NYE after all. So.) 

What did you get really really excited about? 
     Our cruise! After a horrible mono-sick spring, and job stresses, and a million details nailed down for childcare and such, we got a grownups-only trip to the Bahamas. Cruises are easy and cheesy and delightful, for real.

What do you wish you'd done more of in 2014? 
     Sleeping. I remain a terrible sleeper. A sleep failure. Full stop.

What do you wish you'd done less of? 
     Losing my glasses. It made me cry more times per week than I should admit. Eeeiiii.

What would you like to have in 2015 that you lacked in 2014? 
     A sun lamp for my desk. Also, more time to sit at my desk. And blog, and read blogs, and send emails, and have general me time. It's everyone's dream right? 

What was great this year when you weren't expecting it? 
     Our Great American BFF Road Trip, to move Nathan to Minnesota and say good-bye. It could have been stressy and bickery and exhausting; on some level I was ready for it to be that, yet glad to go and help anyway. But instead it was wonderful and delightful and fun and bonding. Like one of the best things we have ever done, not just this year but ever.

Who is the best new person you met? 
     Ali! Sweet baby Ali! Of course!

What song will always remind you of 2014? 
     Shake it Off and also Let it Go. Also, Anneliese's horribly (delightfully) misinterpreted lyrics to both of those. (Prayers gonna pray y'all.)

Where did most of your money go? 
     Like always - mortgage, taxes, school tuition, and this year more travel than in recent years.

What was the best thing you bought? 
     A new wedding ring. Slash engagement ring. Slash anniversary band. I left mine on our cruise ship and after a small fortune in ship-to-shore calls, and a police report, a report with the cruise line, phone calls to pawn shops in Port Canaveral and Nassau, and six months of crying, it never turned up. I felt (feel) awful even thinking about it. I know it's just a Thing but it's a special thing, from a hugely special moment in my life, and no other thing will ever be that ring, that re-set stone that was my great grandmother's, bonded to that band that Mark put on my hand on our wedding day. But. I sadly took the insurance money, and Mark and I found one that he loved and I loved. It feels a bit like a solitaire and a bit like an anniversary band and it's set in rose gold, and... I do love it. After months with no ring, I am glad to have this one. Especially with the kind words and wonderful promises from Mark that came attached to it, even now, eleven years after our wedding. It is special too. 

Whose behavior merited celebration? 
     My dad, who retired from teaching this year. He has worked in the corporate world, and the military, and has been an entrepreneur with his own small business, but I think of his many careers, teaching is what he loved best. His students loved him, and he was damn good at it. We are proud of him. And! He remains a stand-up Grandpa. 

     (Also, Anneliese deserves celebrating. She was my answer last year too, but she is just really in a delightful stage. Five forever!) (Ages three and seven are getting the side-eye from me today.)

Whose behavior appalled you? 
     Baby Ali on dairy. My word, child. So much screaming. (Ali without dairy = best niece evaaaar. But on dairy? Appalling. I can say that now because it's over, but. Yeah. Picture my wide eyes.)
     Also, people who use leaf blowers, for any reason, ever. Just no.

Who did you miss? 
     Another Nathan, so freaking much. Especially Tuesday nights.

What was your favorite show? 
     I finally got on board and watched both seasons of Orange is the New Black this year. Also, Mark and I loved Parenthood and watched it religiously until the end (*moment of silence for perfect Braverman series finale*). But besides that and The Mindy Project, I... don't watch very much tv anymore? I still love tv, in theory, I just, I think I like the quiet more. (Mark watches all kinds of things, increasingly with headphones plugged into the roku remote, because see again: quiet.) 

What was your favorite book? 
     I apparently only gave 5-star ratings to six books last year. Of those, I think my favorites were The One & Only Ivan (read that one with your kids! it's a good first chapter book!) and The Fault in Our Stars, because I am very mainstream and predictable, and also it was really dang good. 

What was your favorite new movie? 
     Frozen. (It wasn't new in 2014 but we didn't see it til the new year so it was new to us. And yes I unabashedly love it.)

How old were you on your birthday, and what did you do? 
     I was (am) 34, I went for a really fun and delicious Asian seafood dinner with Mark in Chapel Hill, and we shopped for that new wedding band. It was a lovely wonderful night after a hard season of heavy feelings, and I felt really special and close to him. It was a good birthday.

What was your biggest achievement in 2014? 
     Being the best moving boss ever? (WHAT. I WAS.) Also successfully turning Anneliese into Rainbow Brite, twenty years late. 

Your biggest failure? 
     I majorly let down the kids last summer, and myself, and our dreams for the school break. I just had no bandwidth for the fun bucket list items we had planned. I was sad as it happened, sad when it was over, and still sad now. This year will be better. Anneliese is starting kindergarten and I will start back to work at some point, and this summer is a summer for us. I feel fired-up protective of having some family fun.
     Also, that snow adventure thing. We should probably put that in the Fail for The Ages column too.

What countries/states did you visit? 
     The Bahamas, on our cruise. (Also Georgia and Florida, driving to the port.) Also we went to Virginia/Maryland/DC with the kids in October, and I hit several new-to-me states on our great American road trip: Indiana, Wisconsin, Minnesota (and West Virginia, Ohio and Illinois which were not new).

How would you describe your personal fashion concept this year? Have you showered today? Good for you! 
     Yes! And learned how to make my hair wavy! (It was apparently already wavy, I just didn't know.) Does that count as a fashion concept? If so, I could undo that strikethrough. 

What dates from 2013 will remain etched in your memory? 
- February 12, the snow adventure.
- March 7, when Mark accepted his new job.
- March 13, when Ali was born. 
- April 6, when we sang a beautiful Bach cantata that we worked super hard on, and then Charlotte fell down the stairs and I had to take her to get her face stitched up (when I was horribly fever sick with mono, and Mark was on the last shift of his old job, and Another Nathan was at an interview for a new job himself, and whoa that evening was a perfect storm, a microcosm of all of the angst of that season, April 6 you can GDIAF, except for the Bach thing). 
- April 28, when our cruise departed. 
- July 27, Another Nathan's last Sunday at our church. 
- August 4, the date of my one-way plane ticket back to Raleigh after a horribly sad goodbye.

What kept you sane? 
     Hmmm... iMessage? I don't know. Am I sane? I'm not sure I'm qualified to answer this question.

What valuable lesson did you learn this year? 
     And I am definitely not qualified to answer this one. I don't think I have have any good takeaways. Last year was mostly (not all! but a fair amount) sucky for me. Spring and summer were a haze of sickness and angst and newborn crying and a long goodbye. Fall was colored by a rough marriage season, and struggling to communicate with Charlotte and her sudden stuttering. There were so many hard things, and so many of them were things that I couldn't heal or fix, exactly, besides just riding them out. 
     Maybe if I learned a lesson, it's that *feeling better isn't linear, and sometimes you just have to let hard things be hard, until they pass. Which they usually do. And then it can be okay again.

Anyway. Onward and upward! Etc etc.

*Thanks Sarah. #kissyface

Chipmunk Christmas Dance

You know that Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas album? Of course you know it. Everyone knows it. I'm pretty sure no one actually likes it (confession: I think I secretly do), but everyone knows it. We had it on a record (AN ACTUAL RECORD) when I was a kid, and I vaguely remember that it made my dad's ears bleed so much that he would only play it for us one time per Christmas. We would dance around like maniacs in the living room and shriek and sing along, because that makes it less annoying?

Anyway.

The girls did a little dance thing, a tiny show where they danced to a song with their class. And if there is anything that can convert folks (even my dad!) to finding this song adorable, it's Charlotte, dancing to "hula hoop" - behold:


(If you can't see the embedded video, click here to watch it on YouTube.)

Nothing about that video doesn't make me smile. Nothing.

The girls are in a class of mostly young kids, some a little wilder and more dramatic than others. Neither Anneliese nor Charlotte is the best dancer in the class but they pay attention and they try hard and they listen well, and they are so kind to the other kids. And that's lovelier for me to see than anything else they could do in there.

I'm so proud to be their mommy.

Three Somethings Cheerful (And A Bonus 1990s Mark/Erin Story)

Look, I can be cheerful. Three times, even! Ready?

1.) Anneliese sang in chapel choir again last week. She was as adorable and delighted as the first time.

And what's sweeter than a choir full of four-year-olds anyway?

Anneliese is tall* so in the back row, to the right.

*Side story: one of Mark's first memories of interacting with me was when we were taking some group picture for school (band! fine! it was for band! we were at BAND CAMP okay?) and they told us to stand by height and I hopped up into the back row, because apparently part of my self-image is that I am tall? And apparently I am actually... not that tall? (I feeeeeeel like I am tall.) 

So anyway Mark watched as they moved me down a row and then down another and then apparently it happened again (!) later in the school year and he kept wanting to yell at me (in his best Seinfeld-to-George "you're bald" voice): YOU ARE AVERAGE! But he didn't, because he is Mark, and that is just not a very Mark thing to do. But! He does like to bring up this story every time I mention that I am tall, which is apparently still fairly often. Because I am! I mean, not a giant! But fairly tall! Really! 

2.) Charlotte has a new purple peacoat. In my opinion (as the shopper), it is perfection.

3.) Nathan was telling me some story the other night about something that happened at a Boeing parts factory (I don't even know) and he thought it was the best most hilarious mishap ever, and even though the story was actually suuuuper boring, his perfect smile and giggling about it enchanted me anyway.

lampshade on head?

I'm glad I got a picture though so I never have to get him to tell me that story again though. Yawn.

(Y'all hush, I am a good mom, take a seat and stop clutching your pearls.)

Some Things I Have Been Mulling

Here are some things I have been mulling in my head this week (brace yourself, this is bound to be profound) (*shakes head no*):

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I do think overall, I like my iphone better than my android phone, but that is MOSTLY because of imessage. And it isn't that imessage is inherently better than anything else, it's just that everyone else is on it, so it is therefore convenient. Herd mentality something something. And the stream/cloud photo sharing feature is also kind of great. I find myself using that a lot with various people.

BUT I will say these things about the iphone vs my old android:
1. The camera is not better.
2. The battery frankly sucks.
3. The auto-correct on the keyboard thinks it is super smart but it is not as helpful as it could/should be, and not nearly as smart as the android spelling corrector.
4. I am about to have a big ol' fight with my home button, because I have one of those glass screen protectors on it, which means I need a button cover, yet good button covers (which go flush against the curve of the button DO NOT EXIST. Can someone please get on this?
5. Why can you not purchase content from within the kindle app? (Or even link to the mobile site to do it?) (Or purchase downloadable content from the Amazon app?) Stop forcing me into Safari! Just whyyyy?
6. I have this new chevron case for my phone (my other one got dyed blue in my jeans pocket and I keep forgetting to run it through the dishwasher), which is cute but cheap and hmmm I'm still deciding.

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These are all very first world housewife problems, so I should share here with a pic what I already told facebook: Charlotte dropped a crayon in the potty while she was pooping the other day, in case you think three-year-olds don't have problems too. (Like... nine seconds after I took this pic.)

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Nathan has been asking a lot of questions about coffee recently. Like, how to make it. And what is that brown dirt stuff in the bag? And then trying to clarify it all -- so, the brown stuff is the coffee, and the water you pour over the brown stuff is just water that tastes like coffee, but that's not the actual coffee, just the coffee you drink? When I told him the coffee itself was actually ground-up beans that had been picked and then cooked, it blew his little mind. We had to look up a YouTube video. Coffee comes from farmers! So does chocolate! It's also beans! And they look very similar as a plant but then they make foods that look very different by the time we eat and drink them, and isn't that cool mom? And sometimes you can put coffee in chocolate! -- so anyway, now he calls it my liquid coffee which isn't actually coffee, just water that tastes like coffee because you poured it over some ground up beans. "Are you going to drink more coffee mom? Like the liquid kind." Yes, sweetie. People know what you mean when you say drink coffee. In related news, BUDDING PEDANT UP FOR GRABS, LOVES WEEKEND VISITS.

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Also, those look like children who need their own tervises, yes? They want to drink coffee "coffee" like mommy, which is sweet and I will indulge it forever, but maybe I don't want my cups all dirty every day, and maybe we should find some kid-sized ones and splurge, finally? I think I shall procure them for Christmas maybe.

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Everyone else is using the Timehop app, right? This app really speaks to my soul, since I have basically been my own walking Timehop for years. I've been using it for some time, like (I assumed) everyone else in America. But then I mentioned it to a friend, a very smart friend (who is sometimes admittedly clueless when it comes to the thumb of pop culture) (like, maybe once he asked me who Taylor Swift was? I can't remember the details) (*cough*) and he had never heard of it so maybe other people haven't either?

Anyway. It's a simple premise. It tells you what you were doing x number of years ago today. If you're thinking this is information you might not want or need, let me help you understand something: YOU ARE WRONG. Because of this app, I know that seven years ago today, my current second-grader was exactly a month old, and looks like this:

So. It's an app you need, is what I'm saying.

That's all I got today. I will go have some more liquid coffee now.